Are You a Christian Who Masturbates?

OK so I had to break the ice on this one with the comedic relief of the image above because let’s face it… talks about masturbation get most Christians “hot under the collar”. It’s on everyone’s mind (… and on most people’s hands too… er… uh… every pun intended there, lol.) You are far from the only one that has questions about this. So go ahead and get an alias account name so you can post an honest answer and let’s start blogging! (Don’t worry about being required to leave your email address when you post a comment because the other bloggers can’t see it. It is only requested to verify that you are a valid blogger and not a spamware program leaving automated messages.)

For those of you who don’t know, the main reason that I created this blog is to educate people about the spirits of sexual perversion and the adverse effects that they have on our lives, as well as how to get delivered from these spirits so that we can live in freedom and experience success. If you want to know why this is my passion check out the “Who is Dr. Intimacy” page, or even better yet order my book “STDs: Sexually Transmitted Demons”.

At any rate, in an attempt to ensure that I am not  just rambling on about the things I deem important, I would like to post questions and evaluate reader feedback. This will help me more accurately address your specific interests and needs. I know sexual sin is an embarrassing topic to speak on, but how will you get help if you don’t start seeking it?  If you are worried about your image, like I said, create a new account with a screen name and e-mail address that no one will recognize because it is time to start dealing with our issues! I’m here to help and talking about masturbation is a good place to start. about it:

Are you a Christian who masturbates? Why or why not? Do you have any specific Bible references against or in support of masturbation? Do you have specific experiences to share? Please enlighten us!

Comments have been closed on this post. Please refer to the post “Is Masturbation in the Bible As a Sin?” to make comments. Also check out my YouTube video about this.

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

52 thoughts on “Are You a Christian Who Masturbates?

  1. Married and Anonymous says:

    Hello, Everyone. I am a 34 year old Christian man (happily married) and –yes–I do masturbate. Now, before everyone jumps to conclusions, I would ask that you hear my story.

    You see, my wife is very sick with 2 devastating autoimmune diseases that have simply ravaged her body. The first condition (Prurigo Nodularis) has not only left her body physically scarred, but she literally itches uncontrollably for hours at a time. The second is just as sinister.

    Just before we got married, my dear wife was struck with Antiphospholipid Antibody Disorder (APS or ‘Sticky Blood” Disease), which almost blinded her twice and put her on dialysis with kidney failure. After we prayed and sowed a seed toward her healing, God mercifully resurrected her kidney functions and she no longer needs a transplant or dialysis. What does all this have to do with masturbabtion, you ask?

    Well, as you probably may have guessed, my wife also suffers from depression and has been on anti-depressants for years. Her sex drive is virtually non-existent. It started out with us making love about once every 3 months but has gone downhill from there. At current, I CONSISTENTLY go 6-9 months without having any intimate contact from my wife. Even kissing, for her, is chore! To be honest, even if her sex drive were normal, the condition that causes her itching has damaged nerves all over her body to the point that normal, tactile sensations are interpreter to her as triggers to itch.

    I both love and respect my wife. After having watched her go through all that she’s endured, I know that I have one of the strongest, faith filled women on the planet. Despite this, I also have needs–needs she vowed to exclusively meet. Because I do love and respect her and pray every day not to desecrate my marriage bed , I choose to masturbate. I don’t do it often, but I do it to relieve the sexual tension that naturally builds. To me, it’s better than nocturnal emissions (i.e., “wet dreams”).

    For those who don’t know, wet dreams (in men) are caused by a buildup of semen in the scrotum. The body naturally releases the excess semen by taking miscellaneous images from a man’s conscious, waking moments and constructs a sexually charged dream that causes the man to ejaculate while he’s sleep. For most boys and men, it’s embarrassing. For me as a married man, it’s an insult. I feel very resentful whenever it happens and this is why I turn to masturbation.

    With masturbation, I can relieve the stress pinned within my body and not have to deal with resentful thoughts toward my wife. So far, it works for me….

    • Pastor E. says:

      Hi Anonymous,

      First and foremost, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your wife. As I read your comment the first thing that came to my heart about your marriage situation was how important it is for you to stand as a priest and in the gap for your wife. As the scriptures say, we are the priest of our homes. And as priest, it is very important that we understand the purity of a priest and that entails inward purity of our soul, mind and spirit; and outward purity of our physical temple.

      The temple, according to 1 Cor 6:15-20 does not belong to us, it was purchased with the Blood of Jesus and therefore he owns our bodies. I can assure you as a married man who has six children and a wife who has battled sickness for the majority of her life, my struggle with masturbation in my marriage hindered the priestly office that God, Our Father, commanded that I walk in as the head of my household. As the scriptures say “Who shall ascend upon the hill of the Lord and who shall stand in his Holy place, He that hath CLEAN HANDS and a pure heart. Ps 24: 3-4)”

      When I got this revelation that my body was not my own anymore, that I had to give it to Christ and give it to my wife, and vice versa; it helped me to understand the reverence of Christ, as someone who can stand in the gap for my family – as a priest. This is done through the sacrifice of my body, according to Romans 12:2. That’s why I can talk about this, because I have seen the breakthrough spiritually and physically in our marriage and with our children. Me giving up my life, taking my cross up daily, and following the teachings of Christ not just in word and tongue but in deed and in truth, helped me to realize that I was in the way of the deliverance that we all wanted to see manifested in our marriage.

      I had to cease from giving ground to the works of the flesh because I said “I have needs physically that my wife cannot help me with sexually.” My brother, that mind set caused me not to trust The LORD, Jesus Christ as a keeper and a comforter to me as a man that would fulfill me in every need that I can humanly think of.

      Don’t le the selfishness of fleshly manifestations get in the way of the divine deliverance that you so desperately need in your house.

      Grace and Peace Beloved
      Read this prayerfully before you respond

      • JUST DELIVERED says:



        • Dr. Intimacy says:

          Just Delivered,

          Thank you so much sharing how you have bleen blessed. One thing that I want people to really and truly understand is that spirits of sexual Perversion have a very detrimental assignment that extends far beyond just the physical act of sin.

          Even after a person ceases to perform the sexual act in the flesh, the long term spiritual and personality effects will remain if the person does not know how to recognize these things and properly cleanse themselves. Please order my book, The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook. I it will help you so much. Order at

          Thanks again

      • Married and Anonymous says:

        To Dr. Intimacy and Pastor E.,

        I thank you both for your thoughts and prayers for me and my wife. Although I’m not addicted to masturbation, it can be overwhelming at times to deal with the natural desires that are placed in us all by God. I do understand the function a husband as being that of prophet, priest, and king of his house. However, if there is a battle regarding the matter, it has to do with the reality that surrounds marriage. You may be wondering what I mean by that. Let me tell you (and this will also shed some light on the issue of praying for sexual urges to go away).

        According to the Bible, marriage–as heavenly as it can be–is not spiritual. It is only an earthly reflection of our relationship to God, which is spiritual (Matt. 22:29, 30; Eph. 5:23-27; 1Cor. 7:34 [implied by the text]). The Bible also informs us that the natural world (particularly relationships) is to take priority over things spiritual matters (Deut. 24:5; Matt. 5:23, 24; 22:15-22 [note here the order–Caesar first, then God]; 1Cor. 15:45, 46; 1Jn. 4:20). Marriage, then, becomes less of a spiritual exercise or experience and more appropriately understood as a natural function of God’s original design, for “it is not good that man should be alone”.

        But if marriage is a natural state to be experienced only in this life, then most of our religious characterizations of marriage simply become over-dramatized spiritualizations. And if one studies ancient (or recent) Church history, they find this–unfortunately–to be the case. Priests and clerics in the Church were oftentimes subjected to incredible distortions of the Scriptures that strangled their sexuality stripped them of wholeness. During the Council of Nicea (the same council where they settled on the 66 books we now know as the Protestant Bible) bishops and priests were asked to divorce their wives and commit themselves totally to their true bride–the Church. In the context of a husband and his priesthood in the home, fact becomes paramount. We must thoroughly examine our opinion and hold what we believe the Bible says to the light of history to see if the beliefs we hold dear are actually truth or an elaborately spun tale of fiction.

        The truths I take away from my study of the Word is that marriage is for the here and now. Its pleasures are for here and now. And as mature sons in Christ, it is our responsibility to balance our natural walk with our spiritual disciplines. And because this balancing act is a fluid process, it cannot be accomplished in legalism (consider 1Sam. 21:1-6 & 2Chron. 29:31, 34).

        • Dr. Intimacy says:

          Married and Anonymous,

          I have written a detailed chapter about the spirit of masturbation in my book, “The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook”. Because religion has twisted and misused so many scriptures, I took a lot of time in the book to “unravel” the truth if you will and really get down to the heart of the matter. Because at the end of the day, it is not about “to sin or not to sin”; it is about the quality of relationship with God. Anyone that wants to see a scriptural dissertation on why masturbation is not appropriate according to scripture, you are going to have to order the book.

          But I do have another question for you: If you justify your masturbation because of your wife’s sickness stating that sexual ugres need to be met, wouldn’t that philosophy really justify masturbation for every masturbater? I mean, whoever of us do it, do it because of a sexual urge that “needs” to be met. From the young teenage boy that is just experiencing his first erection, to the curious five year old that heard her mother having sex, to the dovorcee that can’t adjusted to being single, to the widow and widower and to those single adult Christians that are “trying to hold out til marriage”. It seems that by your standard that masturabation is just legal all the way across the board.

          What have you to say about this?

  2. John says:

    I am a Christian. I Masturbate. I stumbled upon this website while looking for masturbation material. I am addicted to masturbation. I know I am not supposed to and I feel guilty about it. I have gotten to the point of just admiting that I have to masturbate and just living the double standard. Prayer and fasting have NOT taken the desire to masturbate away from me. I sometimes have the strong feeling like I need to jerk off even WHILE I AM READING THE SCRIPTURES. Come on God, that is not fair. I would love to have my sex drive just shrivel up and die completly so that I could live a more rightous life. I am married, and our sex life is lousy. My wife seemes to think that all sex is evil and only does it with me when she has to then I feel like I am raping her. I turn to masturbation as a “lesser of two evils” so that I don’t go out and break my marrage covenants. I know that this is still a cop out, but I don’t see any other choice. I don’t have and have NEVER had a wet dream. I’ve prayed to receive that release while asleep to avoid pleasuring my self. Doesn’t happen.

    • Dr. Intimacy says:

      Dear John,

      I really believe in my heart that this comment is going to help bring deliverance in your life. I just finished writing you a 15 minute response and when I clicked submit, it just disappeared. That has never happened before! I am that much more determined to help you now!!!

      I am so very, very thankful that you have posted the comment that you did. I t takes courage to confront your own issues and I thank you. I think your honesty is going to help alot of people.

      I want to say to you first of all that I completely understand what you are going through. I had my worse, worse battles with masturbation during or after reading scripture, or doing some other spiritual pursuit of God activity! It was one of the most frustrating and disheartening things that I ever had to deal with as a Christian. I also can directly relate to your comment about fasting and praying not helping to take the desire to masturbate away from you. I’ve been there too.

      So now that I have identified how I relate to your issue, let me share some liberating truths with you.

      1) You are in a better place than many believers who do not even acknowledge masturbation as a sin. You’ve taken the first step toward deliverance by acknowldging that this is an ungodly act in your life.

      2) Praying that your sex drive go away is the wrong prayer. I am glad that it has not been answered. John you are a married man, not a eunuch. Your sex drive is a gift to you and to your wife (even though she does not realize it at this time).

      3) Praying for the desire to masturbate to go away is also the wrong prayer! The desire to masturbate is not the root of your problem. Your sexual urges create a legitimate and legal need in your life. Masturbation is your way to fulfill a legal need in an illegal manner. Think of it like a homeless man who steals food. His need to eat is a legitimate and legal need. However stealing food is an illegitimate and illegal way to fulfill that need. He doesn’t steal necessarily because he wants to steal, he steals because there is no other forseeable way to satisfactorily meet his need. Have you ever known a rich man to steal food? No of course not. So if you can resolve the issues of desperation that are preventing this homeless man from being able to eat, guess what, the desire to steal goes away automatically. Masturbation is the same for you.

      4) Lastly, this is not primarily a physical problem you are dealing with. You are being successfully attacked by demons which makes this a spiritual battle more than anything. Until you see and address it as such, you will always be bound. You are dealing with a number of different spirits of sexual perversion: Fornication, Masturbation, Adultery, and Sexual Lust. There are probably others too. I know you might be confused when I say fornication because you are married, and I know you are confused when I say adultery because you have not cheated. However, I need you and every reader to understand John that spirits of sexual perversion do not primarily manifest themselves through sexual acts alone. They manifest themselves moreso in the character of a person and in a person’s relationship with God. Spirits of sexual perversion – which are really spirits of worship perversion – are assigned to destroy our intimacy with God. The sexual act in and of itself is of the least of importance to them. What matters to them is whether or not they can destroy your relationship with God.

      OK, so now that we have identified the truth about your problem – what do we do about it?

      Are you really serious about getting delivered John? If yes, then I need you to do a little reading. First, I need you to read the second comment on this post, then I need you to read my blog page entitled “Incubus and Succubus – Sex Demons of the Night, and then read the post entitled “What Can’t I Enjoy My Marital Sex Life” along with comment #1 on that post. This will be a lot of reading so you have my permission this one time to print the articles out. Please do not distribute them, they are for your own personal use only so you can read them carefully. I assure you that these four posts are going to give you a tremendous amount of insight into your situation!

      If you are really serious about a change in your life, please follow my instructions John. Also you need to order a copy of my book, “The Spirits of Sexua Perversion Handbook”. It is 300 pages of life changing knowledge that I can’t possibly cover in it’s entirety on this weblog.

      When you have read the above post, please come back and comment here so we can blog about this some more. Please be sure to respond to me. I hope to hear back from you soon. 🙂

      Believing God for You,
      Dr. Intimacy

      • John says:

        Well Dr. Intimacy, I thank you for the time it took to respond to me and to actually do it all twice, I’ve scanned the things you told me to read as I cut and pasted it so I could print it all out like you sugessted.

        I am both frightened and encouraged.

        I will read it all in detail and get back to you. Thanks again, John.

        • Dr. Intimacy says:

          Thanks for responding John and thanks for coming back and following my instructions. It is scary, I agree with you. But whatever you will face will be worth it for what you are going to gain. Please check back in with us.

      • Apostle Ebbs says:

        Love this Dr.

        • Dr. Intimacy says:

          Thank you so much Apostle Ebbs. We are just getting warmed up trust me, lol! I will be opening up discussions about homosexuality in the church, worship, pornography, sex in marriage and so much more. I hope you will come back and share your thoughts and invites others as well.

  3. Yvette Ellington says:

    My name is Minister Yvette Ellington in regard to the recent inquiry, “Is it ok to masturbate?” I am in full agreement with Dr. Intimacy’s comments but also want to add the following. This is what I heard loud and clear in my spirit—also based on the Word of God:

    Masturbation is sex with oneself—whether before marriage or as a spouse. If before marriage, your having pre-marital sex with yourself; and, according to the Word of God, sex (in its original design and purpose) is specifically reserved for the marriage bed.

    If married and engaging in masturbation, such an act is adultery—a married individual having sex with someone else other than one’s spouse—sex with themselves; and, again, sex (in its original design and purpose) is specifically reserved for the marriage bed: “Let marriage be held in honor (esteemed worthy, precious, of great price, and especially dear) in all things. And thus let the marriage bed be undefiled (kept undishonored); for God will judge and punish the unchaste [all guilty of sexual vice] and adulterous.” (Heb 13:4, AMP) As it poignantly reads out of The Message Bible: “Honor marriage, and GUARD THE SACREDNESS OF SEXUAL INTIMACY BETWEEN WIFE AND HUSBAND. God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.”

    Masturbation is illicit (unlawful, forbidden) sex because it is outside the Word of God and, therefore, outside the will of God and His original design; hence, masturbation is of the spirit of perversion, which is to turn aside or away from what God-ordained (His original intent) and accept (in one’s heart) the wrong way as right.

    Based on the above, to entertain (meditate on), embrace and/or remain a masturbator is to be a deviant: to stray especially from God‘s standards and principles…and such will not enter the Kingdom of God: “Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; NEITHER FORNICATORS, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals” (1Cor. 6:9, NIV). As it reads out of The Message Bible: “Do you not know that the unrighteous and the wrongdoers will not inherit or have any share in the kingdom of God? DO NOT BE DECEIVED (MISLED): neither the impure and immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor those who participate in homosexuality”.

    As you get to know me, you’ll come to learn that I like to keep it simple…and real. I trust in the wonder-working power of the Spirit of God that my response to the above is received in the spirit of truth—and love for which it is intended—as I am called to do: “Herald and preach the Word! Keep your sense of urgency [stand by, be at hand and ready], whether the opportunity seems to be favorable or unfavorable. [Whether it is convenient or inconvenient, whether it is welcome or unwelcome, you as preacher of the Word are to show people in what way their lives are wrong.] And convince them, rebuking and correcting, warning and urging and encouraging them, being unflagging and inexhaustible in patience and teaching.” (2Tim. 4:2)

  4. Billy says:

    Yes, I am a christian (and a minister, at that) and, yes, I masturbate.
    For me, it’s a life-long thing. When I was deafened, I’d just been molested, from the age of eight, until I was deafened at ten.
    My first thought was that God had punished me for what had happened and those thought plagued me for the next six years.
    Finally, I thought, “WAIT A MINUTE….I didn’t do anyting wrong, it was forced on me.”
    However, the only prevailing part of the molestation had to do with masturbation and that continued because I was abused, physically,
    both at home and at the residential school for the Deaf.

    By the time I married, I was a life-long masturbator and my wife hasn’t helped me to stop because she is frigid and demands that
    sex isn’t what she wants nor needs.

    • Dr. Intimacy says:

      I’m so sorry for your situation Billy. It is sad that so many women have this frigid, “dirty” view of sex. You and your wife need counseling. It would be good for the two of you to read my book together. I’d be willing to talk to the two of you as well. Or if you want to speak by yourself to a man, I can refer you to a brother I work with. Until then, remember these twelve deliverance steps:

      Deliverance for the soul man
      Step 1 – Confession/Acknowledgement: The very first thing that you need to do is to acknowledge within yourself that you have a problem. This step is about being honest with yourself.

      Step 2 – Discovery: The second thing that needs to happen is the discovery of how demon spirits entered into your life. This is a very important step because it will give you the insight that you need to make sure those openings are closed forever. The four main entranceways for demons are: Generational curses, Involuntary exposure, Spiritual Wounds, Voluntary.

      Step 3 – Renewing the mind: The mind must be renewed in order for change to take place. Our mind is the control center of our being. Feed it the proper information from the Word of God and by all means please keep it free of corruption!

      Deliverance for the spirit man
      Step 4 – Confession/Admittance: After you have been honest with yourself and acknowledged that you have a problem, you need to be honest with God and admit to Him that you have a problem. Do not be shy with God; He already knows anyway; just lay it all on the table.

      Step 5 – Penitence/Humility: Penitence is that next step after admittance. Not only must you admit your sins to God, but you must also experience brokenness and remorse over your sins. Penitence is about humility of spirit and there will be no deliverance without it.

      Step 6 – Confession/Exposure: The third and final aspect of confession is exposure. This aspect of confession is about exposing your sins to an upright Christian. Do not forget the two reasons that you need to fulfill the exposure aspect of confession, 1) the protection of accountability, and 2) the power of intercession.

      Step 7 – Forgiveness and letting go: Deliverance cannot take place if you refuse to forgive others because it will prevent Jesus from healing you. It will also cause your heart to be hard and embittered, making it impossible for the Holy Spirit to work with it. Finally, it will deny you God’s forgiveness of your sins which will prevent you from connecting and fellowshipping with Him.

      Step 8 – Spiritual Warfare: Putting on your spiritual armor: Do not forget about the five pieces of your spiritual armor, which will be used to defend yourself from the attacks of the enemy: The Belt of Truth, The Body Armor of Righteousness, The Shoes of peace, The Shield of Faith, The Helmet of Salvation

      Step 9 – Spiritual Warfare: Using your spiritual weapons: Let us also remember that God has given us mighty weapons of attack that enable us to go after the enemy and defeat him:
      The Sword of the Word, The Power of Praise, The Power of Christian Fellowship, Praying and Fasting

      Step 10 – Spiritual Warfare: Retreat and replenish: In every long war there are times when the warriors must retreat and replenish themselves. Do not forget to rest in the presence of God and be rejuvenated through true worship.

      Deliverance for the flesh man
      Step 11 – Discipline of the flesh: Deliverance in the flesh man is all about discipline. Your body cannot control you! It is the sin nature of the flesh, which is the power of satan that causes you to sin. Fasting is the best way to learn discipline.

      Step 12 – Walking after The Spirit: Once deliverance has taken place in your life, it must be maintained daily by walking after the Spirit. Deliverance is not a once and for all deal. If you do not maintain it, you can lose it. Remember to protect the gateways to your mind. Keep them free of all contamination, corruption and sinful influences by meditating on God’s Word constantly.

      These steps are discussed in greater detail in my book, The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook, which can be purchased at

      if you want to talk about counseling, e-mail me at


  5. Craziness says:

    Masturbation IS legal straight across the board.
    That’s the beauty of this sexual freedom.
    The desires are a gift from God.
    He is explicit about particular ways he does not want this sexual desire fulfilled (i.e. beastiality, etc.).
    Sexual desire is not meant to abuse, or hurt anyone in any way and certainly not to shame the true and living God by way of sexual worship to false gods.
    Taking care of ones own sexual needs is no where forbidden in scripture. You can twist verses any way you like … but it’s only by twisting that you can even sort of make a point.
    Bottom line … Masturbation is not sin.

    • Dr. Intimacy says:


      Concerning masturbation, you are entitled to your own OPINION. Many believe as you do and let me make myself clear in saying that I do not believe for one second that anyone is going to hell for masturbating! However, sexual desires are not a gift from God as you erroneously stated. Sexual intimacy is a gift from God that is reserved for marriage. Sexual desires outside of marriage are just part of human nature and are not in and of themselves a sin, no more than the desire to eat, drink, get angry, sleep, etc… Yet all of the above named desires of human nature can be sinfully acted upon even though the desires themselves are not evil.It is not in the desire but in our response to said desires that determine our state of righteousness or sinfulness.

      Sex was created to take place between two married people and all sexual pleasure should be reserved for the confines of marriage. So keep on masturbating if you choose to because if you are truly born again you will not go to hell for it, but it will create a gulf between you and God in terms of your initmacy with him, and that separation from Him can eventually lead you so off of the path of righteousness that you do other things that will send you to hell – in other words, yes it is dangerous!

      I choose to excel. Your choice is your choice, but I can understand why many people feel the way you do becasue it certainly is a very hard temptation to resist. I will not deny that in the least.

      Blessings to you and thanks for blogging with me. 🙂

  6. Heya says:

    Well it looks like I came to the right place.

    Well my problem started years ago stumbled upon pornography and masterbation. I have been trying to stop for years and I feel that this is eating me away at me + hindering me from progressing further into a relationship with God. For the past few years I have been EXTREMELY hooked on beastiality pornography and I can’t get away from it no matter what I try.

    Any advice on where to start would be nice, I am so hooked no way I can stop at this rate.

  7. Denise says:


  8. juzcheckin says:

    I am a 38 year old woman and I masterbate. I do not believe it is a sin. My hubby has ED but is still very interested in sex. He meets his needs with my body, but is not physically able to meet my needs. So I masturbate to keep my thoughts and flesh in check. I don’t fantasize about other people and I don’t look at pornography. I am simply releasing the sexual tension that has built by trying to meet my husbands needs. I do believe that if someone is masturbating frequently with sexual fantasies or pornography, then yes it is a sin. The act of masturbation itself is not a sin. It is the intent of the heart that causes it to be a sin or not to be.

    • Dr. Intimacy says:


      ED? Meaning that he suffers from premature ejaculation or Erectile dysfunction? I am sorry but you are both “settling”. ED can be overcome with some time and some effort. There are exercises that can be done, dietary changes that can be made and supplements that can be taken (unless it is due to an irreversible medical condition which is very rarely the case). If you and your husband make the loving sacrifice for each other you could work on this problem together and enjoy lovemaking the way it is intended to be enjoyed. Do some research and you will see. But in the event that it is an irreversible condition, your husband needs to satisfy your needs. He can just as easily bring you to climax without penetrating you, as you can bring yourself there. If he is not willing to do that then he needs to retire his sexual appetite and you yours. I don’t believe that either of you will go to hell for what you are doing. But going to hell is not the issue. You are living an insufficient life and Jesus came so we could have life more abundantly. This is not abundant life and masturbation is spiritually damaging to your relationship with your husband and with God whether you fantasize or not.

  9. Hey says:

    hello im really having a huge problem today i saw today in my dream that the so called demon sucumbus is oppressing me and causing me to masturbate, in the dream i start praying and everything go away.But the whole off this day i feel weird and have the desire to masturbate strongly.i came back from work and i start praying against those spirits but still im having the same desire.i hope u can help.thank you

  10. confusion says:

    is this web blog still active?

  11. notnewtoblog says:

    I had no intention on going back to your blog again. One young lady that I counsel from time to time needed spiritual guidance on masturbation and came to me for help. I was very vague because first of all I suffer with it. She looks at me as a married Woman of God that should be able to help her but the truth of the matter is I had so many questions about it myself. As I was driving back from a conference, I went into meditation and God spoke to my spirit about how I wrote her concerns off. I literally stopped at a restuarant and found some of the same scriptures you have suggested in your responses 1corin. 6 12-20. God spoke to my spirit especially about the 17th vs he that is Joined with the lord is one spirit with him. Then the next vs simply states flee sexual imorality. I went from the standpoint because of whose you are you must flee sin against your body. Your body belongs to God. I also stated that he is responsible for your needs and he can give you a mate after his on heart. She stated that she wanted us to pray and keep working on this issue. I came to check my email and this blog some how was in my email??? I feel This is a revealation from God to help me in my situation and be of more help to her. I would like to write you more personally if possible

    • Dr. Intimacy says:

      Dear Notnewtoblog,

      I am so glad that you have gained insight. Masturbation was my biggest sexual struggle as a sold out woman of God. So ask me anything you want. Let’s keep it here on the blog though so that others in your situation can benefit from our communication.

      Love you and thanks for your honesty. 🙂

  12. KJO says:

    I don’t know if this will help anyone but if it does, To Yah be the glory. This is my story on how i was delivered from masturbation. I remember when I was in high school, I’m not sure how it started or when it started, but I do believe it was in part due to the influence of my freinds who at the time used to masturbate and I guess I just became curious. All I remember is that every saturday morning I would wake up, pray, blast my gospel music in the house (because I was the only saved person in the household and I was trying to give everyone a little bit of Yahshua), and do my chores. But somewhere in the middle of doing my chores i would just feel this sudden urge to masturbate and no matter what I did to distract myself, even prayer, I could not shake the feeling until I did it. So I would drop what I was doing, go and handle my business, then feel guilty and pray and cry and come out not understanding why i couldn’t stop doing this. This went on for a very long time until it got to the point that I would purposely wake up later so I can just get it over with and out of the way in order to go on with the rest of my day. There was no time that I thought my behavior was normal but the urges were just too strong for me to shake. I began to notice that these feelings would happen at almost exactly the same time every week and at the time I was in such a deep relationship with Yahweh that didn’t want anything to mess that up. So one day when I woke up I prayed and just waited and waited until the feelings to masturbate came and when they came I sat on my hands and began to tell the devil off in the worst way. I was saying things like you think you can make me do whatever you want, well I don’t belong to you, and the answer is no. I will not touch myself, no no no. And I just continued to give as much attitude and lip a normal teenager would probably give to their parents or a peer they are upset with. I identified the devil as my enemy and I told him he wasn’t gonna be able to do whatever he wanted with me. I continued to do this every week and by no means was it easy. I mean it was crazy I couldn’t understand why the urges were so strong, but I knew I didn’t like the hold that it had on me. I can’t pinpoint a specific day that I was delivered, neither can I recall a moment of significant epiphany. All I can say is that I told the devil no, and sat on my hands until the urges left and I continued to do this until he stopped bothering me. This was maybe 7 years ago and to this day I don’t even feel any urges to masturbate even if I try to think about it, It does nothing for me. I guess the devil realized he couldn’t bind me in that area. I heard a preacher once say we are to “Give the devil the greatest fight of his life”. I guess this was a battle he just could not win because I made up my mind not to be bound by the spirit of masturbation.

  13. Tommy says:

    In response to (Yvette Ellington):

    I, too, like to keep things simple. However, one can hardly conceive of masturbation as an act of adultery without twisting the words of Scripture. If the logic noted in this kind of exposition given above is extended to its limits, then Yahshua forgot to include masturbation as an adjunctive to fornication for divorcing a spouse! Imagine that . . . a spouse being caught masturbating that leads to divorce. As one will see, it quickly becomes silly, if not just plain rubbish, when thought of in this light. It simply cannot be supported by Scripture.

    However, I would like to further note that masturbation cannot always be regarded as a sinful act. A lot can be said here, but for the sake of time I will call attention to John and Billy where you find in both testimonies a very strong element of compulsion at the demonic level, even as also revealed in the testimony of Dr. Intimacy on some of her posts. But one can masturbate without compulsion or strong demonic influence and it be acceptable to his level of faith. The issue lies in the heart and what’s going on there.

    Please allow me to state that my position is not to defend masturbation as if I have something to gain. It is not a bondage for me and never has it been in my life, and I am 41 years old, married with children. Neither do I practice it with any regularity but have done so on occasion. However, I find in the Leviitical law of Yahweh where masturbation is neither condemned nor encouraged. Leviticus 15:16 basically gives permission for it as a legal act. But some may want to conclude that it is referring to a man’s nocturnal emissions as it does in Deuteronomy 23:10. It is not. Though you will find in a couple of translations where it references a man’s seed departing from him in his sleep (see The Bishop’s Bible and Miles Coverdale Bible in particular), I submit that it was placed there at the privileged error of the translators. The overwhelming majority of most translations says nothing of sleep emissions concerning Lev.15:16. And, yes, a contextual reading is definitely encouraged.

    Again, much can be said here. Allow me to conclude by saying that I can hardly condemn the gentleman in Anonymous and Married, nor anyone else, for his practice of masturbation. We are not called to live by another’s revelation or faith, particularly on matters as controversial as masturbation is within the Christian community. But as the prophet Habakkuk has said, the just shall live by his faith. Let everyman be fully persuaded in his own mind, for the Scriptures tell us whatsoever is not of faith is sin. (Pauline epistle of Romans)

    • Dr. Intimacy says:


      I love your comment. I absolutely love it when someone gives me an intelligent and well presented scripturally based argument. I’m going to have to post a response tomorrow in order to properly prepare a scriptural rebuttal. I hope you will come back to see it, I would love to hear your response.

      • Tommy says:

        Dr. Intimacy,
        I look forward to your comments on my above submission.

        I do want to clarify somethin in my closing remarks (the last paragraph), however, that may be misleading to some, depending on how one may read it. I was skimming over it again and realized that I said something that could be read a couple different ways. I was attempting to say that neither myself nor anyone else can condemn the gentleman in Post # 1 for his practice of masturbation, as he stated himself that he didn’t do it often and neither did there appear to be a demonic element in his behaviors (at least on a surface level).

        But I noticed it actually appears to read as if I was saying that no one has a right to condemn the gentleman in Post # 1 or anyone else for that matter, in their choice to masturbate. Forgive me, for I was not trying to communicate that! Masturbation, like so many other vices, can definitely become sin and bondage to those who know not the principle of moderation. (Pauline epistle of Philippians)

    • Wake Up says:

      Tommy, this I don’t share too often, but to validate what is being shared regarding these lust demons providing spontaneous orgasms, in males and in females, known as incubs/succubus. One night, when I was still struggling with this, I knew I was sound asleep, I woke up SUDDENLY, I realized that I had just had an orgasm! And walking out of my bedroom I saw a very tall, skinny man with all black clothes and a black hat leaving my room! This website is for real, tell all the christians you know.

    • Dr. Intimacy says:


      I’m sorry it has taken so long. Your’s is a response that I needed to spend some time on.

      As far as Minister Ellington’s comment about masturbation falling under the guides of adultery, I would rather agree with her and I explain why in great detail in my book. When you understand that sexual acts have much greater physical implications than they do spiritual, it will make a lot more sense to you. This is what I focus on explaining in my book, “The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook”. But if she has more to say on it, I will let her respond and you are certainly encouraged to pick up the book.

      I want to address the scriptures you referred me to in the Levitcal Law. You said,

      “Leviticus 15:16 basically gives permission for it as a legal act.”

      Here is the scripture in Lev that you referenced in two different versions of the Bible.

      “16And if any man’s seed of copulation go out from him, then he shall wash all his flesh in water, and be unclean until the even. (KJV)”

      “16 “Whenever a man has an emission of semen, he must bathe his entire body in water, and he will remain ceremonially unclean until the next evening. (NLT)”

      I don’t understand your logic in using this scripture as making masturbation legal. The whole purpose for being declared cermonially unclean was as an acknowledgement of an act in which you operated outside of the perfection of Yahweh’s Law – specifically the Mosaic Law in this case!

      These are all of the definitions of the original Hebrew word that was translated as “unclean” in the KJV

      to be unclean, become unclean, become impure

      to be or become unclean sexually, religiously, ceremonially

      to defile oneself, be defiled 1b
      sexually 1b
      by idolatry 1b

      I had actually overlooked this scripture in Lev when I did my studies on sexual perversion. But I am so glad that you brought it to light because it only further strengthens the fact that masturbation is definitely a sinful or at the very least, an unclean act and that it causes separation between the committer and God. To be cerimonally unclean meant that the person declared as such could not participate in any spiritual activities. Therefore, if masturbation makes one unclean and causes a temporary separation between them and Yahweh, how can it be justifiable? Didn’t Christ come to reconcile us to Christ? Then why would we willfully continue on in acts that separate us from Him?

      Is it justifiable just because Yah was gracious enough to make provision in the law for a person to be restored after committing the act? No, I think not! He made provision for us to be cleansed after all unclean acts, for that is what grace does.

      As far as the scripture you referred to in Dueteronomy my argument would be the same. “10If there be among you any man, that is not clean by reason of uncleanness that chanceth him by night, then shall he go abroad out of the camp, he shall not come within the camp: (deut 23:10)” You made reference to the fact that this scripture has erroneously been translated as “nocturnal emmision” in some translations. This may or may not be true, but whether the scripture is referring to deliberate masturbation or spontaneous dream-time ejaculation, a person becomes impure from such an occurrence. And spontaneous orgasms, in males and in females, most often occur because of lust demons known as incubs/succubus. Even that in and of itself is ungodly. You can read my article on them on the dedicated incubus page.

      Lastly Tommy, I must say that I was quite disappointed at this statement in particular you made, “But one can masturbate without compulsion or strong demonic influence and it be acceptable to his level of faith. “

      Wow! Of all of the noble uses for our faith I can’t imagine Yeshua smiling down on us from Heaven as he observes us using our “faith” to justify and condone impure sexual acts. Meditate on that. You said it is a matter of what is going on in one’s heart and I couldn’t agree more. Why would a married man want to selfishly use his own body for sexual pleasure? Your body belongs first to the Lord and then to your wife. What is really motivating your occasional sexual affair with your own hand? And are you comfortable with knowing that each time you indulge in this act, whether once a day or once a year, it causes a separation between you and Yahweh and waters down the anointing on your life? What does your heart say about that Tommy?


  14. Wake Up says:

    Masturbation is a topic I too have struggled with. But what I have learned is when the Spirit is high (study, worship, preaching whatever) the Flest is high. We must always remember that our own flesh is one of our enemies (flesh, world and the devil). Sin enter through our minds. This is why we must have our minds renewed by the Word of God. Ususally during masturbation you think of someone, lust for someone. That’s where the sin is actually committed first. If any man/woman “looks” on a man/woman and lust after them the sin is committed already. When lust is concieved, it brings forth sin. Sin brings forth death. Because we know the wages of sin is death. Some people avocate that if you don’t lust after anyone, it’s not a sin. But Anavah brings out other points concerning our bodies belonging to Christ that have to be considered. The following is what the Lord gave me concerning the issue. So when it comes up as an urge. I remember what he told me.

    Until your married, your body belongs to the Lord and He is able to keep you. You can be alone– but not be lonely. “If you don’t bother it, it won’t bother you” for the single servant, God can put those desires to sleep, on a shelf so to speak. But the bible says it’s better to marry than to burn with passion.

    Thank you so much for bring up this topic, it certainly needs to be addressed. Forgive me for not giving the scripture references.

    • Dr. Intimacy says:

      Thanks so much Wake up for sharing your experience.

      I was wondering about a comment you made: are you saying that sexual urges will actually go away completely until you are married if you ask this of the Lord?

      I have a friend that is afraid to pray for her urges to go away fearing that they may not come back when she actually gets married. Then I have another friend who is married and was celibate for 13 years. She lost her sexual desire during that time and it has not returned.

      What is your experience as a single woman?

      • Wake Up says:

        Dr. Intimacy,

        What I am trying to say is as we give in to any addiction by continuing to participate in it, whether it’s a little or alot, we GIVE it power over us. Sex is a fleshly desire comparative to food, the more you eat the more you want to eat. Of course, we know that food is a necessary consumption. But sex is a mental release that brings bodily pleasures. I’m not saying that the urges will stop coming. But what I have found is that when I made up my mind to allow the Spirit of Christ to rule over my body, the urges subsided. Why, because mentally I TRULY want to please GOD MORE THAN MYSELF. The lust demons will tempt us. But the bible says that the temptation in NOT sin. He said yeild NOT to temptation, for YIELDING is sin. My experience is that the more I REALLY wanted to please God in this area, when the urges come up, like any other temptation, I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me. I CAN say NO! It’s like any other sin. Christ said when we truly recieve what HE SAID and BELIEVE IN HIM. Sin no longer has dominion over me. HE HIMSELF will break the power of sin over us. And who the Son sets free, is free indeed. Only He can do it. But we really have WANT IT. Sex is more mental than physical. You can “rule” over it in your mind and Christ will give you the power to do the rest. It will always be a struggle to some degree, just like all of our OLD ways that come to haunt us.

        As for the woman who is fearing that prayer, we know God hasn’t given us a spirit of fear, but of love, peace and a sound mind. So the fear itself– is of the devil. She should seek to please God no matter what the cost. These things are “our cross” to take up as we follow Christ. We crucify our flesh DAILY if we live to please God. The other lady may want to explore whether she is mentally “satisfied” with her husband, this could be a stumbling block for her physcial desires. We as woman NEED to be romanced out of the bedroom more so than in. Alot of men just don’t get that. I hope that I have said something to help you and reasonably answered your questions. God Bless you for your OBEDIENCE to this call.

        • Dr. Intimacy says:

          Thanks so much for that explanation wake up. It is very insightful. Before I was married I was a big time masturbator. I didn’t think anything was wrong with it. I did it as often I felt I needed to and that was quite often. After I got married, it was my husband that taught me masturbation was a sin. It is different being single this time because now I know it is wrong and had to learn how to give God control over my body, as you have said. It’s not easy, but it easier because I have understanding of what I am dealing with and am mindful of the full implications and consequences of masturbation. It’s way more than a good feeling that you’re going to get! LOL. Anyway, I appreciate your insight for us single Christians that need to let God be our all until he sends us our partners in destiny.


  15. Dr. Intimacy says:

    I feel that both John and KJO have testified to a very important truth about masturbation. They both talk about the uncontrollable urges they have/had. If any of you read my post on incubus and succubus, you learned that those overwhelming mindblowing urges are a direct reslut of lust demons that are commonly referred to by those names.

    Note how KJO had to confront the devil, (the evil spirits) in order to gain the victory. That is exactly what I tell people when I instruct them on how to get delivered from incubus spirits. You have to recoginize that you are dealing with a demonic force and address it as such. Even Married and Anonymous from comment #1 was probably dealing with attacks from incubus spirits because another way they manifest themselves is in dreams, or “nocturnal emmissions”.

    Please believe me when I tell you, incubus spirits, which again is just a fancy name for sexual lust demons, play a very big part in masturbation addiction. If anyone is in bondage to masturbation and you no longer want to be, I really encourage you to read the page on incubus and succubus.

  16. maR says:

    Hello Dr. intimacy

    Unfortunately im having the same problem. I was molested at the age of 5 and since then it seems that i have a addiction with sex.I have read a book about incubus and succubus and im really trying to deal with that aspect. Every time that i mastrubate i find it difficult to pray cause i feel horrible and feel that i am mocking God cause it will happen again. I really want to be free from that.

    • Dr. Intimacy says:

      Ahhh yes, I call that “the guilt phenomenon”. Guilt is one of satans most effective weapons that he uses against up anonymous. You have to understand that guilt and condemnation never come from your loving Father. The Holy Spirit will cause you to experience conviction which leads to actions that bring about correction. Conviction is liberating where as guilt immobilizes you, causing you to move further away from God so that the enemy can have even greater access to you. After you do it keep praying anyway!!! This was one of the most powerful things that I learned over the years about deliverance, that until you bind up every incline of guilt you will never be free. In other words, bind guilt or guilt will bind you!

  17. holly says:

    first of all, thanks for honestly asking this question and providing a place to respond. i haven’t gone through all the comments so far, just wanted to get my thoughts down first.

    i’m a single christian female and i masterbate. i attend church regularly, my small group and my circle of friends is mainly the church. i pray, i worship, i read my bible and i try and model jesus’ love to the people i encounter. i love jesus and all the He has done and continues to do in my life.

    as a single person, i don’t believe self-touch is wrong. i have no one to share this sex drive with yet. but i do have a sex drive and i love the idea of being able to give sexually to my future husband one day. porn is not acceptable. masterbating to a fantasy/scenario is not acceptable unless you’re sharing that fantasy with your married partner. these are things i do not participate when i masterbate.

    remember, i’m not married – i’m single – i’m not dating.

    i believe it is possible to masterbate without the aid of porn or fantasy.

    in my experience so far, i’m noticing i touch myself 5-6 times just before my period (the week before), which makes me think this is hormonal. i focus on pleasure and how it makes me feel. it’s a release. i might masterbate 2-3 times between the time after my period until the week before it starts again.

    i would be interested to hear a christian perspective on masterbation which incorporates health and hormones research.

    also, i’ve read some articles on christian views of masterbation and one author pointed out that the bible remains silent on the topic of masterbation, rather discusses the issues of sexual immorality and God-given guidance for sex and marriage for husbands and wives, which i find interesting as well.

    i’m open to hearing what people think and i hope the people who read my comment will provide me the same openness. thank you!

    • Dr. Intimacy says:


      Thanks for sharing your experience. I am glad you brought hormones and science into the discussion because such matters are highly “under-rated” when Christians discuss such issues. Yes hormones have a lot to do with your sex drive and as your period approaches there is a spike in the hormone levels that trigger your sex drive. This also the case for pregnant women often times as well. It is normal for you to feel the urge to masturbate more around your period.

      As far as the Bible’s “silence” on masturbation – this is a sentiment that many people use to indulge all types of fleshly urges. The Bible is silent on Pedophilia, Necrophilia (sex with the dead), crack-cocaine use, specifically labling vulgar words, child abuse, spousal abuse, racism… and so on and so forth. If the Bible specifically named every evil deed the human mind could conceive the universes would not be able to contain the volume of the books! That is why sums it up simply like this, “N4 Even Gentiles, who do not have God’s written law, show that they know his law when they instinctively obey it, even without having heard it. 15 They demonstrate that God’s law is written in their hearts, for their own conscience and thoughts either accuse them or tell them they are doing right.”

      There are really only a few basic principles that we need to understand in life in order to be able to accurately decipher right from wrong. When we under the “purpose” for something then it is easy to recognize abuse of that purpose. The core problem with Believers and their sexuality is our lack of understanding God’s purpose for sex. It was designed as His gift to the husband and wife, their reward for marriage. Your body as a single woman belongs to the Lord as is stated in 1 Cor 6. Once you get married your body belongs to your spouse as stated in 1 Cor 7! So while the Bible never mentions the word “masturbation” it clearly defines who the body belongs to and what sex is to be used for.

      As I stated to other commenters, masturbation wont send you to hell, but it will certainly diminish the quality of your relationship with God and rob you of the reward of withholding. Here is the thing that singles don’t realize too, it will be very difficult to stop masturbating once you are married. You will be so accustomed to your own touch that your husband will have a hard time satisfying. When a man can’t please his wife, adultery is right around the corner.

      I hope this helps and thanks again for sharing.

  18. Anonymous says:

    Masturbation is a sin that I’ve stayed away from for a few months. The one thing I’d like to add is that is is sex with self, and even though there may be images of the other sex used, it still opens a door for a lesbian or homosexual spirit to enter your life. I struggled with porn and masturbation this past summer, and once, I had a dream of this lady having sex with me in which I was aroused. I was confused until God showed me that my masturbation opened the door. This sin also makes an individual ‘isolate’ as you are meeting your own needs instead of needing others. It creates soul-ties if ‘images’ are used to create arousal which thus opens the door for extra demons. How could this not be a sin?

    • Dr. Intimacy says:

      Wow I am giving this comment a big thumbs up sis! Did you read my book? If not then all I can say is that flesh and blood did not reveal these things to you but The Spirit of God has! You are 100% correct about the door to homosexuality and hit the nail on the head with the isolation and soul ties. Thanks so much for sharing that powerful insight. I believe that you have a calling in this area of ministry. Please get my book, The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook and don’t stop pressing in for your full deliverance!

  19. Believing For Freedom says:

    HI I have been reading you book Spirits of Sexual Perversion. Yes I am A Christian and around the time I picked up your book I have had 2-3 encounters with masturbating and each time its like I know what Im doing it and yet I don’t stop…..anyway I’m being set free in the name of Jesus. I just wanted a more clearer understanding of the confessions of details to the Father, what does this kind of confessions do in the spirit. I honestly just feel embarrassed telling the Father these things. I figure that bringing these things to the Father which is light is better that keeping to my self which is darkness and that is where the enemy operates. IDK I just need some clarification clearly.

    • Dr. Intimacy says:

      Believing for Freedom,

      This is a very good question you asked. I can understand the embarrassment of confessing your sins to the Father in detail but remember that he is right there with you when you actually perform the act anyway. The detailed confession is for your benefit, not for his. Your heart will try to deceive you, detailed confessions tears down the lies that we build in our hearts over the years that become the barriers to true deliverance. Also, often time through confession God is able to reveal to us what the open doors are for the things we are confessing about. I know it is frustrating to keep falling but keep up the good work. You are doing the right thing. And just remember that spiritual deliverance is a lot like a physical detox. As your body detoxes you experiences unpleasant manifestations like gas, bad breath, headaches, breakouts, etc… spiritual detox is the same way. Sometimes it gets worse before it gets better. As long as you don’t let guilt bind you and stop you from pursuing your goal, you are will see victory!

      • Believing For Freedom says:

        Does confessing it to another individual do the same thing except with more of an impact…..B/c I’ve stopped the process for a moment to seek God if he wants me o share these things with another individual, I love the explanation you gave as far as intercession and the person can pray for me (or people) however I’m concerned about the shame and embarrassment i will feel when it comes out. Like I said I’m seeking the Lord on it, He knows how I’m feeling about it. I do trust that He will lead me into His perfect will concerning it….PLUS I WOULDN’T MIND SOME PRAYER!!

        • Dr. Intimacy says:

          Believing for Freedom,

          You are referring to the 12 step deliverance in my book I assume. To answer your question confession exposure serves a unique and irreplaceable place in the deliverance process. It serves an important role that cannot be fulfilled any other way. Now please understand that i am not at all suggesting that you stand up during testimony service and expose your struggles. You should confess to a person or small group that is anointed and full of love and compassion that will keep your confidence. Embarrassment shouldn’t even come in to play when confession is before this type of person and remember that many more people than you could imagine practice some kind of sexual sin. You are not alone in t his and you are taking important steps. I am proud of you, keep pressing through and keep me posted.

          God Bless

  20. happy-boy says:


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