Christian Women and Adultery

I have observed a disturbing epidemic lately in the instances of devout Christian women committing adultery and divorcing their husbands. This is a very dear topic to me that affected me in a very personal way, and thus I am compelled to share the revelations that I received about this attack on Christian marriages. There are a number of these situations that have been brought to me, or that I have become aware of. What has been most disturbing to me about this is that the women who have fallen prey to these attacks seem like the most unlikely candidates. Not Gomer-type women, but instead the type of women that you read about in 1 Peter 3:1-2,

1In like manner, you married women, be submissive to your own husbands [subordinate yourselves as being secondary to and dependent on them, and adapt yourselves to them], so that even if any do not obey the Word [of God], they may be won over not by discussion but by the [godly] lives of their wives, 2when they observe the pure and modest way in which you conduct yourselves, together with your reverence [for your husband; you are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere him – to honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and in the human sense to adore him; that is to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love and enjoy your husband]. (AMP)”

I prayed to God for insight in scripture about the spiritual wickedness behind this trend. And He led me to look at 1 Peter 3:7 and 1 Samuel 30:1-6. 7Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.(1 Pet 3:7 NKJV)” You see a woman who is fulfilling the mandate of 1 Peter 3:1-2 becomes dependent on her husband and that is what makes her the weaker vessel. This scripture is not referring to physical weakness. There is nothing in the context of this chapter that would suggest that. It certainly is not referring to the wife being spiritually weaker. That is made clear with the clause, “as being heirs together of the grace of life”: stated in the New Living Translation as, “but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life.”

But if not physically weaker or spiritually weaker, then what is Peter teaching us here? He is teaching us that a woman becomes the weaker vessel emotionally, or “emotionally fragile” in order to fulfill her role as helpmeet. Therefore Peter, who was a married Apostle, exhorts Christian brothers to, “…live considerately with [your wives], with an intelligent recognition [of the marriage relation]… (1 Pet 3:7a AMP)” In other words, live in consideration of what she has to sacrifice emotionally to become that submissive, dependent, adaptable, quiet-spirited, obedient woman who blesses you as a helpmeet.

Now keeping all of that in mind, let’s look at 1 Samuel 30:1-6 (NIV), 1David and his men reached Ziklag on the third day. Now the Amalekites had raided the Negev and Ziklag. They had attacked Ziklag and burned it, 2and had taken captive the women and everyone else in it, both young and old. They killed none of them, but carried them off as they they went on their way. 3 When David and his men reached Ziklag,   they went on their way.3When David and his men reached Ziklag, they found it destroyed by fire and their wives and sons and daughters taken captive. 4So David and his men wept aloud until they had no strength left to weep. 5David’s two wives had been captured—Ahinoam of Jezreel and Abigail, the widow of Nabal of Carmel. 6David was greatly distressed because the men were talking of stoning him; each one was bitter in spirit because of his sons and daughters. But David found strength in the LORD his God.”

Reading this text is where my understanding came together: the women were left unprotected and taken captive by an enemy! God said that this is what is happening in many Christian homes. The woman in 1 Peter that strives to be that perfect submissive wife, leaves herself vulnerable by willingly becoming the weaker vessel. There are certain attacks that she is simply not strong enough to protect herself from because she has willingly become dependent on her husband.

During times of war in those days, when a woman was taken captive she was forced to marry one of her captors or forced into prostitution. In other words, in her captivity she became an adulteress. It was not a choice that she made or a path that she chose for herself. But the enemy got a hold of these women that were left uncovered and unprotected by their husbands and thus the enemy, “carried them off as they went on their way.”

The wives of today that are being affected by this same enemy spirit that you see operative in 1 Samuel 30 – this spirit that is assigned to steal the wives and children of the soldiers of the Kingdom – are being carried away too! The way of being for these loving wives is to serve the Lord and their husbands. But once your enemies take you captive, they take you their way as the scripture says! In captivity to satan’s attacks, these woman become what they do not want to be and do what they do not want to do.

Christian men – Apostles, Prophets, Evangelists, Pastors and Teachers especially – beware! This spirit wants to steal your family. And guess what? Only a woman who is emotionally neglected can fall prey to such an attack. Look at verse 6 again, “…for the men spoke of stoning him because the souls of them all were bitterly grieved, each man for his sons and daughters.” You see, no mention was made of these men grieving over their wives. They did not honor their wives. They only cared for what the women could add to them, but cared not for the women themselves. Yet understand that if you fail to dwell together in understanding with your wife; honoring her as the woman who voluntarily made herself weak for the sake of loving and respecting you; thereby allowing the enemy to steal her – you will lose not only her, but all that she gave birth to in your life as well.

Most of the time, a woman taken captive in war is never seen or heard of again. She becomes someone else’s wife. And though taken captive against her will, because she has the heart of a true wife, she will serve and honor her new husband (the scripture calls the husband master in 1 Pet 3:6 [AMP]) just as she did you. And yes, the Lord will bless her because she was a victim of circumstance. Fortunately in this text, David honors his wives and is determined to pursue the enemy and reclaim his them. Because of his love for his wives, his prayers are not hindered. The Lord answers his prayer and all of the women and children are recovered.

Men if you have found yourself in a similar scenario, pursue your wife immediately before the enemy carries her out of your reach. If your marriage has not been affected by this, do not allow it to be. Love, honor, cherish and desire your wife above all. If your wife is long gone and has become the wife of another or her heart is beyond your reach, forgive her and yourself. Examine how the enemy got in and stole your family. Cover her in prayer regardless of the outcome, and move forward with the revelation knowledge of what it will take to be successfully married in the future – if you so choose to marry. Even if you do not marry again, you can help other brothers protect their families.

I did a powerful teaching on this on my YouTube Channel. You can find it here if you have not already seen it. Be sure to watch parts 1 and 2 of the teaching. 

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

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The Understanding Intimacy Series – All Post

Are you looking for all the posts in the Understanding Intimacy Series? All the post links are below. Thanks for reading. Please remember to like the posts and share them on Facebook!

Understanding Intimacy Part 1: Why Did God Create Sexual Intimacy?

Understanding Intimacy Part 2: What We Learn About Worship Through Sex

Understanding Intimacy Part 3: How is the Practice of Communion Like Sex?

Understanding Intimacy Part 4: Naked and Not Ashamed

Understanding Intimacy Part 5: Getting Pregnant with God’s Will


Why I Believe In Network Marketing

MLM pays! I took this picture at my company conference over the weekend. This is my mentor’s Rolls Royce, Mr. Holton Buggs. He is teaching me the principles of success so I can earn what I need to be free. I don’t want a Rolls Royce but I do want to be able to buy a needy family a car. And  hey, if I can afford a Rolls how many reliable vehicles could I buy for the needy? Getting into this company changed my life forever. It gave me the time freedom to be here available to minister to your needs. Don’t let someone else’s ignorant negativity talk you out of the opportunity of a lifetime. Multi-level marketing is not a scam. Network Marketing has created more millionaires than any other industry in history. Here are 10 facts about MLMs that you should know before you close the door to a money and time freedom opportunity that could literally save your life just as it did mine!

1. You are qualified to start today!  Unlike a traditional job no one will disqualify you due to lack of education or tell you to come back after you get your certification when you want to get started! You don’t need any special degree or qualifications to start your own MLM business. Unlike most traditional jobs, you can get started without any special prior experience. You don’t need any sells training or experience or any networking experiencing to start your own MLM business.

2. Your time belongs to you! Unlike a traditional job you can set your own hours. Don’t think that you don’t have time to start a successful MLM business. Although you will have to put in a lot of hours if you want to become wealthy through network marketing, you can start earning money in most MLM companies putting in as little time as 2 hours per week and work in more hours as you choose.

3. You don’t have to be wealthy or take out a loan to get started! Unlike a traditional job, career or business where you have to invest thousands or even tens of thousands of dollars in education and start-up capital to be successful, most MLMs have inexpensive start-up options for those that are struggling financially. You can get started in my company for around $50 bucks!

4. Retire in just a few years instead of a few decades! On a traditional job you have to work 30 to 40 years before you can retire; to receive only 40% of what you were earning before retirement – that is if the company doesn’t fire you before you have a chance to retire with full benefits! MLMs are not get rich quick schemes. Most of them have to be worked diligently for 2 to 5 years in order to earn retirement income. However let’s put that into perspective: 40 to 60 hours per week, for 40 years, to retire on 40% of your income, which will no longer be paid once you and your spouse both pass away — or 15 to 20 hours per week; for 2 to 5 years; to retire with 5 figure monthly residual income that you can leave as an inheritance to your children and grand children when you die? Hmmm… really, what makes more sense?

5. A pyramid is the strongest structure in existence; make it work in your favor! A traditional corporation is the most diabolical pyramid structure in existence. You have one founder or CEO who benefits the most, a handful of top-level executives under him, a small army of under-paid middle management employees under the execs, and then a sea of miserable, over-worked employees at the bottom that are selling the hours of their lives away to make the CEO at the top rich! You see the people on the bottom of a corporate pyramid will never move to the top where the CEO is; they are stuck there as long as they want to keep that JOB (Just Over Broke). MLMs have gotten a bad rap for being “pyramids”, but a networking pyramid is unequivocally better than any corporate pyramid because you are never “stuck” at the bottom. In an MLM, the people who work the system most effectively are the ones that move to the top. You can join 10 years into a company’s existence and in a year’s time be earning more than a top income earner that was there from day one. Don’t be stuck at the bottom of a corporate pyramid, move to the top of an MLM pyramid!

6. You handle your own money and invest or save it the way you want to! There are many traditional corporations that have come under fire lately for mishandling funds in such a way that hurt their employees. Mishandling of 401k and retirement fund money has left people flat broke after decades of saving for financial security in their old age. The truth is that you never know what is happening to your money when you put it in the hands of a corporate stranger whose agenda is never to make you financially secure, but is always to make his or her position with the CEO of the company secure by making that person even wealthier. So it seems like corporate jobs are much riskier “schemes” than MLMs. What makes an MLM illegal is when there is no legitimate product or service being offered by the company and the distributors are paid only to recruit other distributors. However the majority of MLMs are legitimate companies that offer in-demand products and services that the public wants or needs. Making the product or service available to the public through a networking platform is simply a method of advertising that enables the people who enjoy the use of said products or services to earn income through sharing them. You make the money and you keep the money; investing, saving and/or spending it when and how you choose.

7. More available tax write-offs means keeping more of your hard-earned money! The average traditional job offers very few tax benefits. However, by starting your own MLM business you get to take advantage of more than 400 tax write-offs available to small business owners. You can actually write off the cost of fuel, airline tickets and meals when you travel for business. Part of your mortgage and utilities can be written off and so much more. This means that you get to keep more of your money in your pocket!

8. Travel freely and still make money! Many people would love a job that allows them to travel, but most traditional jobs keep you stuck in a stationary place for many years. Inactivity causes health problems such as obesity, poor circulation, carpel tunnel syndrome and so many others. But with an MLM business you can travel anywhere you want to and build your MLM business. You can even introduce your MLM business to your hometown where possibly no one has ever heard of it and enjoy major profits from the benefit of “first movers advantage”. Stay active, live healthy, enjoy traveling and get paid to do it – then write it off!

9. Unlimited income potential to get paid what you are actually worth! On a traditional job there is a cap on your income potential. No matter how hard you work your set wage or salary won’t allow you to make over a certain amount of money. You can work the hardest on your job and get paid the least.  You can come early and stay late and see no difference in your pay check. The average annual income in America is $38,000 per year. The average income for home-based business owners is $60,000 per year. You see in most MLMs there is unlimited income potential. If you only want to work hard enough to supplement your income with $10,000 a year you can do that or you can work extra hard for a few years and make 20 million dollars a year. There is no limit to the money you can earn in MLM and you get to decide how much effort you want to put into reaching your financial goal.

10. World Class training and personal development to help you realize your full potential in all areas of life! On a traditional job your personal development would lead to you believing in your own ability so much so that you finally wake up and realize that you are not going to keep selling your time to make some corporate fat cat rich, while you only get paid 10% of your actual worth and either end up dead or dead broke by the time you are 65! Too much personal development will lead to you  calling in well, “Well… I’m not coming in anymore!” LOL. Therefore a corporation is not going to invest time and money into your personal development or even encourage it! However, in a network marketing company your personal development will lead to you successfully setting and achieving  higher financial goals for yourself. The more money you earn in an MLM, the more the company earns as well. Your personal success in not a threat to the founder of an MLM company the way it is in a traditional corporation, which is why you can look forward to free or inexpensive world-class training offered by your MLM company. After spending a couple of years with your chosen company, you will understand the principles of success and be developed enough to achieve whatever you set your mind to for the rest of your life. The personal development you achieve, will always out weigh the value of the money you earn in a good MLM company.

With these truths established, why has networking gotten such a bad rap? Because people are lazy and don’t stick with the company’s system long enough to see a return on their investment. Then they spread the word that “it didn’t work”. The truth is “they didn’t work”! But unlike a traditional job where getting fired means the end of your relationship with that company, no one can fire you from your MLM business except you and therefore no one can stop you from re-hiring yourself! If you have tried before and failed, it is only because you expected “overnight success”. You have worked on your job for years and you are not rich, yet you quit an MLM business after the first month because you are not rich? Not a very fair demand on MLM when you look at it that way is it? No worries though; this is the most forgiving industry in business. You can start again today with your old company or with a new one and still succeed as if you never left. Or if you have never tried before, now you can start with realistic expectations.

Now of course not all companies are created equally and there are those that are better than others. I have been with my company, OrGano Gold, for 2 years now. It is the fastest growing company in momentum in the world right now. By comparison our distributors make more money and have more active team members than any other MLM company around. Please check it out. You never know if this may be just what you have been praying for. If you are interested, you and I will be able to work together personally and you will not only be helping your own finances but will also be sowing into this ministry by helping me financially and keeping me free to serve the public with the revelations God has given me.

Check out my company at this web link www.energizegourmetcoffee.com or see the ‘Free Coffee and Easy Cash‘ page on this blog. If you don’t think the business opportunity is for you, please consider buying some product from my website. It is a great product and will make a great Christmas gift too. I can show you how to get it at wholesale as well if you are interested. If you have been blessed by what I do on this blog then show your support!

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

Understanding Intimacy Part 5: Getting Pregnant with God’s Will

Continuing on with the Understanding Intimacy series we come to part 5. In this post I will share with you the 4th essential lesson that we can learn about our intimate relationship with God through human sexuality. This final lesson is so critical. Have you ever wondered why so many visions, dreams and prophetic words in your life have not yet come to pass? This is going to help you understand it in a way that you never have before! You have to learn how to conceive!

If you want to read the other entries in this series please check out this post “The Understanding Intimacy Series – All Post“. 

4. The Creative Power of Worship

The fourth thing that sexual intimacy in the natural teaches us about worshiping God is that we have creative power when we join together with God intimately in worship. Sexual intercourse in marriage not only demands monogamy, establishes covenant and promotes intimacy, but it also gives a couple creative power. The love between a husband and wife can cause a baby to be born here on earth.

The power to create a baby does not come merely from sperm and egg. Something more powerful must first exist in order to afford conception an opportunity. In other words, before a sperm and egg can meet to form an embryo, something has to bring that man and woman together to engage in sex. Sexual intimacy in a marriage ordained by God is fueled by the love that exists between the man and the woman, and it is the power of that love that brings them together.

Let us consider that for a moment. In essence, the love between a husband and wife cannot be seen, heard, touched, tasted or smelt. To us that live in a seen and tangible world love is more of a “concept” than a “thing”. Something is only real in this realm when we can interact with it using our five senses. Yet, the intangible and unseen concept of love can be manifested, or made real here on earth when the sexual intimacy that is fostered by that love causes a living, breathing human being to be conceived and born.

Before the baby is ever born, it already exists inside of the bodies of its parents. The love that the parents share already exists too. But neither the baby nor the love can be seen with the naked eye or actually brought into manifestation, until the couple comes together in sexual intimacy and the husband deposits what is inside of him into his wife. It is as if once the baby is born you can actually “see” the love, by seeing what the physical expression of that love (sexual intimacy) has produced. Even though the existence of the love and the baby was always certain in eternity, a physical vessel was needed to create something that could be considered real here in the earth realm. Thus, the unseen love and the unseen baby, is manifested using our seen, physical vessels.

In just the same way, God’s unseen Kingdom is brought into manifestation here on earth through our seen, physical vessels. We know that Elohim is the Creator of all things and that in the beginning He created everything that we now see through that which could not be seen – the power of Christ (Gen chap 1, Heb 11:3). But after creating all things, He ordained the laws of nature and He now adheres to those laws that He Himself set in order. Therefore, in order for God to manifest things that exists in the spirit realm (the unseen world) here in the earthly realm (the seen world), He must use physical vessels.

Everything that ever has, does now or ever will exist here on this earth has always eternally existed in God’s spiritual Kingdom. Yet by His own sovereignty, the Father chose to use us as a way to get it from “there” to “here”. When we join together intimately with God in worship, we have the same creative power spiritually that an earthly husband and wife does naturally, when they join together intimately with one another in sex. When we worship Him, He makes a deposit in us. His Spirit, His power and all that He is, is implanted into us. We conceive and give birth to His Kingdom and His will and cause it to be done here on earth just as it is in heaven (Mat 6:10).

Why is it necessary though for us to have this creative power spiritually? Just because The Sovereign Lord ordained it so! It cannot be done any other way. Outside of modern medical technology, the way God originally designed it is that without sexual intercourse, a couple cannot conceive a baby – they have no natural, creative power. Without us worshiping God intimately we cannot conceive His Kingdom – we have no spiritual, creative power! The same way that babies exist in the bodies of their parents even before they are ever born, God created in us seeds of greatness. Seeds of the power, majesty, splendor, greatness and glory of His Kingdom already exist within us, but He must first enter into us and fertilize those seeds in order for them to ever become anything more – anything real. He can only fertilize what is in us when we come together with Him intimately in worship, and then we together with the Almighty Creator, can be used as vessels to manifest His creative power.

Just think about it. God could have multiplied the earth in any way that He chose. Every so often a human being could have just popped up out of the soil like a plant. So why did He chose to do it through the process of sexual intercourse and procreation? He designed it this way because He wanted us to understand our creative power when one with Him! How wonderful is our Lord to share with us His awesome power to create. Hallelujah!

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

Understanding Intimacy Part 4: Naked and Not Ashamed

Continuing the series on Understanding Intimacy we come to part 4 today, the third lesson that we learn about our worship through sexual intimacy. This is the most powerful of the four lessons for me. Understanding this revelation changed my relationship with God forever and changed my entire perspective on intimacy and what a relationship between a husband and wife should be like. If you are planning to marry, the quality of relationship described in this post is what you should be looking for in your mate. If it’s not there, work to get it or call it off! To find all post in this series visit The Understanding Intimacy Series – All Post.

The Intimacy of Worship in Spirit

The third lesson that we learn through human sexual relations is about the intimacy of worshiping God. A man and woman who are truly in love enjoy the act of sexual intimacy immensely. They consent that their bodies belong to one another (1 Cor 7:4) and they use every part of those bodies and all five of their senses to express their love and desire. They touch, smell, taste, hear and see their lover during sexual intimacy. Not out of a lustful desire, but instead out of their love for one another, they are easily aroused sexually. Unashamed, they embrace in nakedness to explore one another in body, soul and spirit.

Through intercourse two lovers become one in all three realms, as they completely give themselves over to each other. Likewise, God wants to own us and wants us to give Him ALL of ourselves in worship. He wants us to be easily aroused – ready to worship Him at any moment. He does not want us to come to Him ashamed and covered, but instead He wants us in spiritual nakedness to allow Him to freely explore and touch every part of our spirits. He desires to freely and fully give Himself to us as well. He wants to reveal Himself to us. He desires oneness with us His creation, but we have to be willing to embrace Him. Who really enjoys sexual intimacy when their partner is resisting them?

For scriptural proof that the intimacy of worship is essential to God’s heart we can look at John 4:23, “… true worshipers shall worship the Father in spirit and in truth: for the Father seeketh such to worship Him.” How important must worship be if the God who is sovereign and owns everything is actually seeking true worshipers? Wow! To worship God in spirit means to give Him everything in you as you worship Him not from the head, or even from the flesh, but from your heart.

In the natural there is a difference between “making love” and merely “having sex”. Having sex is a pleasurable physical experience but is empty of heart and soul. When a couple that is in love has sex, they do it with their entire beings. It is not just a physical act, but instead is the Ultimate Physical Expression of a deep abiding love that comes from the heart.  True worshipers are those that worship The Lord in spirit, in the same way a husband and wife who are truly in love share sexual intimacy in the natural. We worship with our hearts and not just our bodies.

To worship Yahweh in truth means to come humbly but boldly to Him, in the sincerity of all that you are; knowing that He will accept you because of the great love shared between you and Him. Have you ever wondered how a very attractive woman ends up with a “hard on the eyes” man? Her love covers all of his faults; in her eyes he is beautiful just as he is. This is the revelation of Adam and Eve being before the Lord “naked and not ashamed”. A loving couple has no problem standing completely nude before one another even in bright, revealing lights, regardless of the condition of their bodies.

Can you imagine the shock of a man thinking that a woman has naturally long hair and then during sex he accidentally pulls off her wig? (Laugh). It sounds funny I know, but this is how we usually present ourselves to God. Of course, He is not shocked when our “wigs come off”; He is just disappointed that we thought we needed them. When a woman knows that she is truly loved, she doesn’t have to go to bed with make-up on, or wear wigs and fancy sex outfits to try to present an image that she thinks is more acceptable than the truth of who she is! This is how God wants us to come to Him, in truth, allowing His love to cover all of our faults. We are beautiful in His eyes just the way we are. To find this kind of worship is rare, and that is why Yahweh is actually seeking those that will worship Him this way. Worshipers of this kind are actually restoring back to Him what He lost in the garden at the fall, vessels that will stand before Him naked and unashamed – allowing Him to enjoy the perfect design that He created you with – not marring your beauty with fig leaves – which are nothing more than dead trees.

You show me a couple that lacks sexual intimacy in their relationship, and I will show you a couple that is disconnected, does not know each other well soulfully or as friends, does not enjoy spending time with one another and misrepresents one another in the presence of others. It is the exact same way for believers that do not worship God intimately. Given that we are His vessels and representation here on earth, you can understand how crucial it is that we stay connected to Him through worship. We have to stay connected to The Vine!

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

Dr. Intimacy on YouTube

Hi I am really excited to give you this quick update on my new YouTube Channel. I will be answering questions from the blog on the channel, doing Bible studies and posting ministry updates. Check it out and give me your feedback. I would love your advice on how to shape the channel. As of 11/23/2011 there are 7 videos on the channel. Please “like” the videos and share the links on FB and PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS! It means so much to me to read your thoughts and encouraging comments!

http://www.youtube.com/user/DrIntimacy?feature=mhee

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

drintimacy@drintimacy.com  

 

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

Understanding Intimacy Part 3: How is the Practice of Communion Like Sex?

I am continuing my series on understanding intimacy. If you have not read parts 1 and 2 of the series, please read them before reading this article. We ended part 1 with the revelation that there are 4 lessons that God wants to teach us through the sexual intimacy of a husband and wife, according to His perfect design for sex. This post today is about the second lesson that we learn through the sexual intimacy of a husband and wife. To find all post in this series visit The Understanding Intimacy Series – All Post.

Establishing and Strengthening Blood Covenant

The second lesson that we can learn from the act of lovemaking is the great importance of worshiping God for the establishing and maintaining of our covenant with Him. The most critical purpose of sexual intimacy between a husband and wife is to strengthen and re-establish the covenant bond and partnership between them. Friendships may come a dime a dozen, but covenant relationships are rare. That is part of what makes the marital relationship so special, it is a covenant relationship that is established in blood.

Let’s examine this. It is medically known that the first time a woman has intercourse, she sheds blood. This can happen at times other than the first as well because it is an increase in blood flow to the woman’s genital area that enables arousal and lubrication before and during sex. Blood is also the driving force behind the erection and ejaculation of a man. His penis is actually made up of tiny blood vessels that swell with blood to cause an erection. This blood stimulates all of the sensitive nerve endings in his genital area helping him to maintain the erection until the pleasure build up causes him to release his seed. When it comes right down to it, sex is all about blood flow!

What is the significance of this? Well, in the Bible we learn that the most powerful covenant that can be made is one that is established in blood (Ex 24:8, Zech 9:11, Mat 26:28, Heb 9:18-22). Taking into consideration the blood flow involved in sex acts, understand that a blood covenant is made between a husband and wife when they first have sex – regardless of virginity or lack thereof. Through sexual intimacy they become partners to one another for life. A blood covenant can only be broken by death or by the establishing of a new blood covenant which cancels out the old one. Thus every time that couple connects their bodies and blood in intercourse, they are strengthening the established bond and covenant between them.

We too are in a blood covenant (through the Blood of Jesus) with the Father. Just as is the case with a husband and wife, each time we worship Him we re-establish and strengthen our bond and spiritual covenant with Him. We see a picture of this parallel even in the practice of communion where we partake of the Body and Blood of the Messiah (Luke 22:19-20). Scripture tells us we are to do this “in remembrance” of Jesus, who brought us the New Covenant. During sex a couple takes in each other’s bodies and also drink in each other’s blood (by the exchange of fluids that occur during open-mouthed kissing). You take communion every time you have sex!

This is a hint as to why there is a natural drive for sexual intercourse after an argument. Discord weakens the bond that holds the covenant together, sexual intercourse re-establishes it. Couples NEED to share intercourse frequently, and we likewise must worship God frequently. If you were to observe a couple that has poor and infrequent sexual relations you would find that couple does not understand the concepts of partnership, loyalty and commitment in marriage. (There are always exceptions due to illness, distance, age, etc., but any close, intimate couple had frequent and enjoyable intercourse at some point in their marriage.) Unsatisfactory sexual intimacy is the number one cause for infidelity. This is not because the physical aspect of the sex is so important, but is instead because without the intimacy that sex represents, all other aspects of the relationship falls apart.

It is so important for a married couple to have mutually enjoyable sexual intimacy often. Each time they lay together and partake of one another’s bodies and blood, they are reminded of the covenant they made to one another as husband and wife. This bond is strengthened as time and tribulations reveal their commitment to one another. It is equally as important for us to experience mutually enjoyable worship with God to help us remember our covenant and remain faithful to Him.

“24 and when He had given thanks, He broke it and said, “Take, eat; this is My body which is broken for you; do this in remembrance of Me.” 25 In the same manner He also took the cup after supper, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in My blood. This do, as often as you drink it, in remembrance of Me.”  26 For as often as you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord’s death till He comes. (1 Cor 11:24-26, NKJV)”

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

Non-Sexual Adultery

What is adultery actually? Well the literal definition according to most English dictionaries is to have sex with someone other than your spouse when you are married. We don’t need to expound upon that definition too much, as it is pretty apparent exactly what that means. The only insight that I would add to this literal definition is that sexual contact, even when it does not include full penetration, is unequivocally adultery!

I can remember this one couple that I encountered. The guy was accused of adultery, but he and the other woman in question disagreed on whether or not they had actually had sex.  She said that they did have sex, but he said that they didn’t. He concluded that even though they were both but naked in bed together, kissing, humping and climaxing – it didn’t count because he only ‘peeked his head in’ without fully penetrating her. OK I’m sorry for that graphic description, but the ludicrous guise of deception that people are under sometimes is just astonishing to me. We had to spend months worth of counseling just to establish whether or not sex had actually occurred between he and his mistress, before we could move on to any real deliverance sessions! I am not usually this descriptive and won’t be often,  nor do I invite comments of such nature. Everyone once in a while it is just necessary to get really raw though, because someone reading this was offended at the guy I just described… until they remembered when they did the same thing! So let’s just be honest with ourselves my brothers and sisters, so that real deliverance can occur in our lives without delay.

But anyway, back to my topic. Outside of the obvious literal meaning of adultery, there are other ways that adultery can manifest itself in one’s marriage.

If you are married, pornography would definitely fall under the umbrella of adultery for you. Through pornography you are creating a sexual connection with another person. People watch pornography because it is sexually stimulating. As a married person, you should only be receiving sexual stimulation from your own husband or wife. That is why Yeshua states in Matthew 5:27-28, “27You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’ 28 But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Pornography is commonly accompanied by masturbation and on-going sexual fantasy. Long after the video is no longer being viewed, you are repeatedly committing adultery in your heart and mind.

 There is also the most subtle form of adultery that has as of lately claimed more formerly faithful wives than you might imagine. This form that I am talking about is commonly referred to as emotional adultery. This happens when you develop and nurture strong feelings of attraction, love or friendship with someone other than your spouse. A frequent doorway for this type of adultery to enter into one’s marriage is through the forging of an internet relationship, which often times at the onset seems like such an innocent and safe way to make an emotional connection with someone. It also frequently occurs in close working relationships, between close family friends and with spiritual leaders or mentors as well. Really, any ongoing communication between two people can lead to this type of adultery if not carefully monitored.

For the broadest understanding of what adultery is – always remembering that we are to consider first the motive of the heart before we consider anything else – it is anyone or anything that you become intimate with. Yes, I said anyTHING too! Marriage is a sacred covenant that you enter into with the promise to love, honor and cherish above all else. Furthermore, don’t forget that marriage is designed to be the symbol of our relationship with The Creator. Just as NO one or NO thing should ever come before God in your life – aside from your intimate, personal relationship with Him – NO one or NO thing should ever come before your spouse.

You should not have a closer friend; you should have no secrets; you should have no greater love; no greater intimacy; no greater oneness; no greater loyalty, commitment or connection of any kind; than that which you have with your spouse. This includes people – especially your family and even your children. This includes places – such as your job and even more especially the church. And this includes things – such as sports, hobbies and even ministry pursuits! Don’t get an intimate relationship with God confused with public ministry. Your intimate relationship with God should always come before your relationship with your spouse – your public ministry never should!

Any bond or intimacy that you create with anyone or anything that takes away from the esteemed first place of honor that should be reserved and dedicated to your spouse alone, is a betrayal and a violation of your sacred marriage covenant. Let me put this disclaimer out there: I am not endorsing the use of this revelation to offset a free-fall of divorces on the grounds of “non-sexual adultery”. However, I believe that the absence of this understanding is destroying more marriages than any other weapon in this present day. The spirit of adultery is present in more marriages than we can possibly conceive. Surely, when the spirit is present and prevalent in subtle, non-sexual manifestations of adultery – it is likely that sexual adultery will follow. That is why it is so important that you grasp this broader understanding of what adultery really is.

How do you feel about what I shared in this article? Have you been a victim of non-sexual adultery or maybe a committer of such or is this absolute gibberish to you? Let me know your thoughts.

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

Is Masturbation in the Bible As a Sin?

Last month  I posted an article entitled “Are You a Christian Who Masturbates?” There were a lot of interesting comments and some deep questions. I was not specific as to any particular scripture when addressing the topic. I wanted to give people a chance to share their thoughts on it. But now it’s time for “Dr. Intimacy’s Final Word From Scripture” on the matter. This is a tough one to break down and it took some time to unravel the revelation in scripture. So you might want to grab a cup of coffee and get your Bible and a notebook, as I take you deep into the text to reveal a Biblical answer on the question of masturbation!

A lot of people debate over whether or not masturbation is actually a sin. Many people want to confine the Word of God to our limited English language and vocabulary. Because in their hearts they desire to indulge in sin, they feign ignorance due to the fact that every evil act is not noted in black and white in the Bible. However, the Bible tells us in Romans 1:18-19, 18But God shows his anger from heaven against all sinful, wicked people who push the truth away from themselves. 19For the truth about God is known to them instinctively. God has put this knowledge in their hearts.”

Admittedly, there is no scripture in the Bible that says, “Thou shall not masturbate”. So hey, if you want to chance standing before God on judgment day with your hand in your pants, you can try this omission of specific language out as your defense! However, for those who hunger and thirst after righteousness, you are getting ready to get your fill: the Bible Truth concerning masturbation. Since there is no scripture that uses the word “masturbation” (simply because there is no word-for-word translation between the languages used) let’s examine some scriptures where it can clearly be read between the lines.

“Run away from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.” This scripture in 1 Corinthians 6:18,  has often been debated as to its relevance toward masturbation. This is because verses 15 and 16 of this same chapter, as you will read further down, makes specific reference to female prostitution. However, in order to fully understand a scripture, you have to examine it within the context of the entire passage that it is connected to.

That is why I want to take a look back to first Corinthians chapter 6 beginning at verse 9. By doing so, we can find some pretty strong references to masturbation. Since this is a long passage of text, let’s look at the scriptures a few at a time beginning with 6:9-10 “9 Don’t you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don’t fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality10 or are thieves, or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive, or cheat people—none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God.”

The author of this text makes specific mention of several different acts of sexual perversion: sexual sin, adultery, male prostitution and homosexuality.  Homosexuality we understand clearly to be sexual relations or attraction between two people of the same gender. Male prostitutes are clearly men who exchange sex for money or favors, most often with other men and often as a part of idol worship. Adultery is understood to be sex between a married person and someone other than their spouse.

Then we are left with the term “sexual sin”. What is the author referring to with this term? This text was written during a time when it was culturally acceptable for men to have as many wives as they wanted to. This means that a man could not “technically fornicate” in the way we think of fornication, which is “sex outside of marriage”. If a woman was single and agreed to have sex with a man, they were married – unless she was a prostitute or committing adultery. With female prostitution already being addressed directly in verse 18 and adultery already being addressed in verse 9, what else are we to believe the term “sexual sin” means here, as it is certainly not fornication?

Now let’s look at verses 11 – 14. “11 Some of you were once like that. But you were cleansed; you were made holy; you were made right with God by calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.  12 You say, ‘I am allowed to do anything’—but not everything is good for you. And even though ‘I am allowed to do anything,’ I must not become a slave to anything. 13 You say, ‘Food was made for the stomach, and the stomach for food.’ (This is true, though someday God will do away with both of them.) But you can’t say that our bodies were made for sexual immorality. They were made for the Lord, and the Lord cares about our bodies. 14 And God will raise us from the dead by his power, just as he raised our Lord from the dead.”

In this passage in verses 11-14, the author expounds upon his reference to being “greedy”, made earlier in verse 9. By doing so, he is trying to help us understand that just because we have been made “clean”, does not mean that we are exempt from the bondage of sin. You can eat, and eating in and of itself is not bad. However, you can also be greedy by overeating and overeating can be deadly. Let’s face it; overeating is suicide on a payment plan. Carelessly subjecting your body to unwholesome, damaging activities is sinful. In other words, just because the body functions enable you to perform an activity, doesn’t mean that you should engage in that activity. The author gives this simple, practical example about eating because it is easy to relate to.

Then the author wants to build upon this understanding and apply this same concept to sexual immorality in the next passage, making the point clear once again: just because you can do something, doesn’t mean that you should do something! 15 Don’t you realize that your bodies are actually parts of Christ? Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! 16And don’t you realize that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, “The two are united into one. 17 But the person who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with him.”

So now, looking at verses 15 and 16 in consideration of the entire message being portrayed, the specific reference to prostitution is no more the “focus” of this passage than any of these other specific references. What is more important than the reference to prostitution are these clauses from 13, 14 and 17: “But you can’t say that our bodies were made for sexual immorality [like you can say the stomach was made for food; and since you can’t say that it makes engaging in sexual immorality even that much worse]. They were made for the Lord, and the Lord cares about our bodies. 14 And God will raise us from the dead by his power, just as he raised our Lord from the dead… 17 But the person who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with him.”  These clauses are important because the truth of the matter is that ALL sexual perversion causes you to become one with somebody. Whether done rightly through marriage or wrongly through homosexuality, prostitution or adultery – sex makes you one with the person you join to.

This truth is just as applicable in the case of masturbation as with any other sexual act. Your body belongs to the Lord and is designed to die to self and sin, after you have been cleansed and set apart. This is apparent because in the middle of a passage that has nothing to do with natural death or resurrection, the author makes a clear indication of your body being raised from the dead. This is the death of flesh, death to self, death to your own will and your way that the author is talking about. When you let your body die to sinful ways, God will raise your dead body up as a standard of righteousness for all to see! Yet, instead of dying to self and becoming “one spirit” with The Lord, you are exalting your own sinful life and becoming one with the will of your flesh. And so finally, we can read verses 6:18-20 with full understanding.

“ 18Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body. 19 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself20 for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.” The Apostle Paul clearly and deliberately covered each type of “sexual immorality” (the general term that is used for all sexual activity not done with your spouse) in this passage: adultery, male prostitution, female prostitution, homosexuality and masturbation (sexual sin). The specific illustration of prostitution in verses 15 and 16 is only used to help paint a clear picture of sexual perversion that everyone can undeniably agree is sinful. He follows this illustration by pointing out that we are to be “one spirit” with the Lord.

I don’t believe that if Paul could have translated this passage into English himself that he would have included a break between the two clauses in 17 and 18, “one spirit with him” and “Run from sexual sin!”  This is one continuous thought, leading us into understanding that masturbation, which is what I believe he is referring to when he uses the term ‘sexual sin’, is just as perverse as prostitution and all of the other acts of sexual immorality mentioned in this chapter. It is not at all by coincidence that this clause is followed in verse 19 with these words: “You do not belong to yourself…”

The text could have said, “You do not belong to a prostitute….” or “You do not belong to an adulterer…” or “You do not belong to a  homosexual…” But instead it clearly states, “YOU DO NOT BELONG TO YOURSELF!”: A vivid picture of the act of ‘self-sex’ and taking liberties with your own body that are not harmonious with your estate as The Temple of the Holy Spirit.

You see, Paul wanted to ensure that no matter what kind of sexual addiction you are dealing with, you would know that this text applies to you… Yes, even you who freely indulge yourselves sexually. Now all you have to consider is this: Does masturbation honor God with your body? Can you see yourself at the throne with the 24 elders, who will be casting their crowns before Him in worship, bowing and saying, “Holy, Holy, Holy…” while you are indulging in your own flesh, enjoying sexual lust by your own hand? That is what you have to ask yourself.

Check this out on YouTube 

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

Understanding Intimacy Part 2: What We Learn About Worship Through Sex

I am continuing my series on understanding intimacy. If you have not read part 1 of the series, please read it before reading this article. We ended part 1 with the revelation that there are 4 lessons that God wants to teach us through the sexual intimacy of a husband and wife, according to His perfect design for sex. The next four posts in this series, beginning with this one, will reveal what these four lessons are. To find all post in this series visit The Understanding Intimacy Series – All Post.

Lesson 1: Worship only one God – the True and Living God

The first and I believe the most important purpose of sexual intimacy is to help us understand that we are to worship only one God – the True and Living God that created us. We learn in the scriptures above that just as a married person is to have sex only with their one spouse, we are to worship only our one Lord. God implemented sexual intimacy as an act to be performed between one man and one woman only. This is obvious because He took only one rib from Adam’s body to create only one woman (Gen 2:21-22). There was no other man on earth that Adam had to share his wife with!

Every other activity that spouses do together can be done with someone else as well. Sex is the only act that a spouse cannot do (lawfully in the sight of the True God) with any other human being. Understanding that sexual intimacy is equivalent to worship, we can easily see that this is true in our relationship with God as well. We can interact with others in many of the same ways in which we interact with God. We talk to God – we can talk to people; we seek God – we can seek things; we praise God – we can praise accomplishments; we desire God – and we can desire people too.

Performing any of these acts toward people or other pursuits is perfectly lawful in God’s sight. Worship is the one thing that The Lord tells us we are to do to Him and Him alone, as is stated in Exodus 34:14, “You must worship no other gods, but only The Lord, for he is a God who is passionate about his relationship with you.” So you can see how sexual intimacy between husband and wife in the natural is symbolic of spiritual intimacy (worship) between God and humanity in the spirit. Just think of how jealous and hurt a man or woman is when they know that their spouse has been unfaithful to them. Our Lord feels the same way when we worship any other god (a god can be an object, person, pursuit or activity) beside Him.

I will post lesson number two in the next article on this series. And remember, you can read the full revelation on this topic in my book, “The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook.” which can be found on http://www.drintimacy.com.

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

Understanding Intimacy Part 1: Why Did God Create Sexual Intimacy?

Anything you don’t understand, you are bound to abuse. That is why scripture admonishes us in Proverbs 4:7 to get understanding in all that we get; for wisdom truly is the principle thing. Before you can can really grasp anything else I write about on this blog, you are going to have to get a good grasp on the core foundational revelation upon which this whole ministry was built.  I will be sharing this revelations with you in the “Understanding Intimacy Series” which will be contained in a number of posts. If you plan on being a regular follower of this blog and really want a deeper understanding of wholesome intimacy and deliverance from sexual perversion, study this series carefully. All of the information in this series is taken directly from my book, “The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook: Updated 2012 Edition which can be ordered at www.drintimacy.com” To find all post in this series visit The Understanding Intimacy Series – All Post.

I believe that the three greatest weaknesses of humanity in the flesh are: 1) The need to eat; 2) The need to sleep; and 3) The urge to have sex. I note these three needs to emphasize how the spirits of sexual perversion work. They take advantage of one of the greatest weaknesses of the flesh – our God-given desire to have sex.

God told man and woman in the book of Genesis to, “…Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth…(Gen 1:28)” There is of course spiritual significance to what God said to them on that day, but there is also natural, practical significance. In laymen’s terms God was basically saying, “I command you to have sex and lots of it!” This may be a little hard to swallow because of our perception of sex. We generally think of sex as something forbidden, naughty or perverse. Let us consider it practically though.

In order  for them to multiply (in its most literal sense meaning to have children) they would have to engage in intercourse to afford conception an opportunity. Then in order to replenish the earth, which is a tall order to fill, they would have to engage in intercourse often so that they might improve the likelihood of frequent conception. Another point to consider is the fact that when God gave this command people did not wear clothing. All of us who are, or once were, sexually active would probably agree that the absence of clothing often times stirs sexual desire. This is especially true if you are in a relationship with someone who you are highly attracted to and in love with. There is no reason to believe there were any exceptions to this basic instinct at the dawn of creation. Yahweh is a very deliberate God and all of this was by no means a coincidence! Thus, the truth of the matter is that God created us to frequently engage in and enjoy sexual intimacy.

What we have to realize is that because man was created in the image and likeness of the Lord God Almighty (Gen 1:26), humanity was created in Holy Perfection. Everything about man (and woman) was good and pure at the time of creation, including the act of sex. But once sin entered into the earth, it perverted everything God had created on the earth. How did sin enter into all of creation on earth considering that humanity alone committed sin? This is because all of creation on earth was under man’s dominion.

Once humanity became corrupt, all that we had dominion over became corrupt along with us. Sin had entered into man and corrupted us in our entirety. The corruption of sin caused us to be separated from Elohim the Creator and without that connection to God, all of creation and everything about it became perverse and evil. That is one of the reasons why David says in the book of Psalms, “I was shapen in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me. (Ps 51:5, KJV)” The act of sex is just another part of what was perverted by sin at the fall of humanity. So now we understand that God actually ordained sexual intimacy and that sex is not bad, but we still need to understand why Yahweh implemented sexual intimacy as a part of the normal routine of humanity.

First off, it is important to understand that everything that exists in the natural world exists first in the spiritual world. The Bible teaches us that God is a Spirit and indicates that His Kingdom is a spiritual one (John 4:24; 14:17; Mat 12:28, 16:26). The earth and all it entails was created to be a natural and physical emulation of God’s spiritual Kingdom. That is why nature was made with such splendor and glorious detail, such precision and perfection. God has given us everything in the natural to help us understand something about His Kingdom and the spirit realm, which is the realm of eternity and is also where the true existence of each and every one of us lives. As a part of this natural representation of Him and His Kingdom, God implemented sexual intimacy in marriage, between man and woman to teach humanity something about the spirit realm. More specifically as far as sex and marriage is concerned, it is to teach us about our relationship with Him.

Through study and revelation of the scriptures we learn that sexual intimacy in the natural is equivalent to worship in the spirit. We can see this by looking at some scriptures in the third chapter of Jeremiah. (Keep in mind that ‘Israel’ and ‘Judah’ were used as names for the collective chosen nation of (Yahweh/God in the Old Testament). “6…Have you seen what fickle Israel does? Like a wife who commits adultery, Israel has worshiped other gods7…And though her faithless sister Judah saw this, 8 she paid no attention. She saw that I had divorced faithless Israel and sent her away. But now Judah, too, has left me and given herself to prostitution.

Scriptures similar to these, referring to idol worship as adultery or some other type of illicit sexual act, can be found all throughout the books of the prophets. In both the Old and New Testament of the Bible the people of God are commonly referred to as “wife” or “bride” (Isa 62:5, Jer 2:2, 2 Cor 11:2, Eph 5:23).Marriage is clearly a symbolic picture of our relationship with God, and theBible makes a strong and clear comparison between sex and worship. Therefore, there is no doubt that sexual intimacy in the natural is equivalent to worship in the spirit or “spiritual intimacy”.

In certain scriptures, we can even see a strong parallel between Adam’s relationship to Eve and our relationship to God, before sin entered in. In Genesis 2:22-24 it reads, 22Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man. 24That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. (NLT)” Then if we take a look at Ephesians 1:4 it reads, 4Even as [in His love] He chose us [actually picked us out for Himself as His own] in Christ before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy (consecrated and set apart for Him) and blameless in His sight, even above reproach, before Him in love. (AMP)”

While restraining myself from writing an entire book expounding upon the depth of revelation hidden in these two scriptures, I just want to point out a couple of nuggets. The woman — the wife — was taken out of the man. We the bride of Christ, were taken out of Him. The woman was made in the man’s own likeness. We were made in the likeness of God. The woman was made just for the man and set apart just for him.  In the same way, we were made just for The LORD and set apart just for Him. Lastly, the man leaves his mother and father to unite with his wife and become one flesh with her. Likewise Yeshua (Jesus) left His Father to unite with us, His bride, and he became flesh with us!

Wow, I get excited every time I read that to know that God wants to be that intimate with us! And this is the foundation upon which I minister on sex, intimacy and relationships. There are four things about the spirit realm, God’s Kingdom and our relationship with Him that we can learn through marital relations and sexual intimacy. We will explore those four things over the next 4 posts in this series. Check back for part 2 and don’t miss a thang!

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.


The Guilt Phenomenon of Pedophilia

Letter from my Advice Page

Good Morning,

I am ashamed of what I am about to write and I have been ashamed for years. I am at a point in my life where I want a real and honest relationship with God, but things that happened in my life makes me feel like I am not qualified. Here is my story:

When I was 7 years old my half-brother told me he wanted to show me what my father does to his mother. I let him pull down my panties and mess with my private parts. I never told my mother until months later when she caught me kissing my pillow and I was teaching my younger cousin how to kiss the pillow to at seven years old, and that was sad. My mother talked to me and told me never to let anyone touch me like that again. But sexual perversion didn’t stop there. Still at seven years old one night my mother was asleep and I was up front watching Cinemax at 12am when a sexual movie came on and I watched the whole thing. From then I had to watch them all the time and I began touching myself. Then the worst thing happened; my cousin that I was so close with (we were like a couple of months apart and she was like my best friends) started watching them together and started playing that way with each other. Then I introduced my other to it who was 5 years younger than me. When I got about 13 and started to know who God was I stopped everything all together — watching those nasty shows and hurting my two girl cousin.

I hated myself and I wanted to die everyday but God would not kill me and I don’t know why. I allowed what happened to me to affect my younger cousins. I ask God why all the time. Now to this present day my cousin that is a couple of months younger than me thinks she want to date girls and my cousin 5 years younger than me started having sex at 14 years old. I blame myself for their messed up lives. As for me, I am a regular going to church person who loves the Lord so much. I have been successful in my life, but this one thing in my life keeps me so in bondage: I can’t tell you enough. I have been asking God that he take that memory away from my cousins’ minds my whole life. We never talk about it. I just don’t know how to truly walk in freedom. Before I get married and have children I want this spirit of sexual perversion gone from my life. I pray for my cousins because it is all my fault. Where do I start for my deliverance?

Please help me, 

Lady

Dear Lady,

Well first let me say that your deliverance has already begun! Just in your confession on this blog your deliverance has already begun. Confession is always the first step to deliverance. There are three types of confession, most people don’t know this: 1) there is confession acknowledgement – this is you confessing to yourself. 2) there is confession admittance – this is you confessing to God, and 3) there is confession exposure – this is you confessing to other people. You have implemented all three steps of confession.

You have also begun the process of discovery. Discovery is when you explore your past to discover where the doors of perversion opened up. This process is usually lengthy because in most cases there are many paths that led to perversion. But you have made a great start talking about what your half-brother did to you and how you began watching pornography.

There are 12 steps to deliverance as the Holy Spirit revealed it to me. You have already implemented at least 4 of the 12. However, you are falling way short on forgiveness. You have not forgiven yourself! There will never be deliverance without forgiveness for first yourself and second for those that have hurt you. The whole point of discovery is to understand why you did what you did and close those doors forever – it’s not to beat yourself down with shame and condemnation or hold your victimizers hostage.

You are experiencing what I call the “guilt phenomenon” that happens when a person commits an act of pedophilia. To take away a child’s sexual innocence is the greatest offense that once could ever commit. People don’t really understand why this is since most people don’t understand the true power and spiritual significance of sex. But the deep spiritual knowing that a child has been tampered with and has lost something that can never again be found — that deep spiritual knowing which cannot always be comprehended in the forefront of one’s intellectual mind — is what causes that unbearable weight of guilt and shame that you are now experiencing.

The reason that I call it a phenomenon is simply because guilt imprisons a soul; and within the prison of guilt the Loving touch of God is not allowed to enter in to administer healing and wholeness. A sense of shame usually perpetuates the onset of perversion and molestation to begin with. Why? Because the power of sexual pleasure alleviates stress and pain and shame, even if just for a few moments. Sexual pleasure medicates the soul for a few precious moments of escape from the tormenting pain of shame and stress. pedophilia is common when you yourself have experienced pain, guilt and shame because such events made you feel helpless and to subject another child to the same sense of helplessness somehow makes you feel more normal – “That wasn’t bad what happened to me, this is just what people do. See, I’m doing it too?!”

Yet here is where it really becomes a phenomenon: in most cases the act of pedophilia although bringing relief initially, afterward only perpetuates the guilt and causes the committer to need to do it again and again for continual relief. The committer feels worse after each act and thus more compelled to do it again. Thus you have the statistics in society today that says a pedophile cannot be rehabilitated. It is unfortunate that law enforcement and the medical community will not acknowledge the spiritual root of pedophilia so that people can get help! They can be rehabilitated if only they can forgive themselves and get healed.

Having said all of that Lady, I may have made you feel worse than better since you have probably never looked at yourself as a pedophile. But take courage my sister. Jesus is the name above every name, label and title. You are the righteousness of God through Christ and you are Holy and Blameless in His eyes according to the book of Ephesians Chapter 1. Now for your own deliverance and for the safety of your children to come – YOU MUST FORGIVE YOURSELF!!! Don’t stay locked up in the prison of guilt that causes most committers of pedophilia to be lifelong repeat offenders, and don’t risk passing this spirit onto your children.

What happened was not your fault sis. You were a victim who then victimized. God has forgiven you and wants to restore your life. As far as your cousins, He can and will get the glory out of their lives. Just continue to pray with them. Similar things happened to me when I was a child and I became very promiscuous too. But now I use my testimony of deliverance and restoration to set people free! Hallelujah!!! I am so glad for every violation that happened to me because now I can offer people hope and encouragement. You and your cousins will one day be able to do the same.

Lastly Lady I want to say this. I think it is critically important that you and your three cousins get together one day and have a heart-to-heart talk about your past together. Then I think it would be great if the three of you would each get a copy of my book “The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook” and read through it together. You can all sponsor each other in deliverance. I would even be willing to facilitate a session with you all once on the phone. They need to understand why they are the way that they are and you can help them. So if you want to take me up on my offer let me know. I’d be glad to help.

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.

The Spiritual Booty Call

Maybe you saw the movie, “Booty Call”. It was a comical depiction of a man’s sex drive. In the movie it may have been funny, but I get a lot of inquiries and prayer request for people dealing with what I call “the spiritual booty call”. Most of us know what a natural booty call is. It’s when a person calls on another person during sleeping hours primarily for the purpose of a sexual rendezvous. Well a spiritual booty call is pretty much the same, except it is not a person that is seeking a late night romp but instead a demon. If you have experienced this before I know your heart is probably beating faster right now as you are thinking,“OMG, other people experience this too!” If you have never experienced this before you might be thinking I am off of my rocker. But I’m not – spiritual booty calls are real and the demons responsible for them are commonly referred to as “incubus” or “succubus”. You can find the definitions right in the dictionary (http://www.Meriam-Webstercollegiate.com) as quoted below:

Incubus: 1: an evil spirit that lies on persons in their sleep; especially: one that has sexual intercourse with women while they are sleeping

Succubus:  a demon assuming female form to have sexual intercourse with men in their sleep

Whenever we are talking about demons, always remember not to put too much merit into the common names that they are called by. Spirits go by many names; even God and satan are identified by numerous names and titles in the Bible. Incubus and Succubus are simply lust demons. Whether or not you are being attacked by these spirits is usually pretty obvious. They manifest themselves to your conscious mind and cause you to experience all of the stimulation and physical feelings that take place during intercourse or sexual contact with a physical person. These spirits are also responsible for sex dreams: those are dreams during which you are engaged in sexual contact or intercourse, or dreams in which your body has a spontaneous orgasm.

A less obvious way that these spirits afflict people is by causing overwhelming sexual urges in the body. You will know that you are being attacked by demons if the sexual urges are so strong that they completely take over your mind. This can happen at any time but tend to be most common when you are lying down. You cannot think about anything else and it seems like nothing you do to make the urges go away works (i.e. a cold shower, involving yourself in another activity, shifting positions, etc.) It would seem that the only relief for the “deadly” urge is to have an orgasm by any means necessary. Sometimes you will have the orgasm spontaneously and they are usually more intense than usual. If you have these types of urges THEY ARE NOT NORMAL.

Understanding why these spiritual booty calls take place will help doubters believe and victims find deliverance. If you read in the Bible in Genesis chapter 6 you will read an account of demon spirits that took on human form so they could have sex with human women. The women became pregnant and gave birth to abnormal children. Incubus and Succubus are the same class of demon that operated in those times, only now they are looking to impregnate you spiritually. The assignment of these demons is to impregnate you with perversions and cause you to birth out spiritual abnormalities.

An encounter with an incubus or succubus spirit will usually leave you feeling drained because they steal virtue from you and in its place impregnate you with perversion and lust. That is why they also cause nightmares. Nightmares impregnate you with fear therefore perverting your faith. Why these spirits like to induce fear through nightmares is because fear brings on a desire to seek out comfort. Sexual activity, especially sexual fantasy and masturbation, provide temporary comfort.

This is a common problem that many people experience. For more information on how to get delivered from incubus and succubus spirits, please visit the dedicated page on this blog. You will see the pages listed there to the left of the screen.

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2011 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright notice on front page for more info.