TIME: While dating, even if engaged, avoid spending excessive time together. The dating period is a time to get to know each other and soberly evaluate whether or not there is potential for a long-term future. Becoming intoxicated with one another’s presence will interfere with your judgement. Once engaged, the engagement period is a time to prepare for a successful marriage. If you spend every waking moment together, what is the point of putting off the wedding?
PLACE: When you do spend time together, stay in well-lit and/or busy, public places. If you do want to engage in an activity at a more private location, such as a person’s house, be sure that someone that will hold you accountable to sexual integrity is there too. When your accountability covering leaves or goes to bed, you and/or your date must leave too!
SPACE: Keep a safe respectable distance between you and your date. Sit across from the table, as opposed to on a booth side by side. Avoid foot rubs, massages, and other stimulating physical contact that could lower your defenses. Don’t lay on one another (such as placing your feet on their lap, or your head.) If you want to share a little closeness in a public place, it is OK, but even in public, too much physical contact may lead to the temptation to go off and be alone. Lastly, if you want to share a kiss, only do so at the end of a date, outside of the house or car, and don’t let it linger past a minute. There is no need for this, or use for it.
If you are spending a lot of enjoyable time with a person, and get into a private place, and fail to keep enough space between you and the person – a fall into sexual immorality is INEVITABLE. So if you want to stay pure until marriage, remember these important principles…
~Daily Insights from Dr. Intimacy~ © 11/20/2012
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