You Can’t Cast Out LOVE: Part 2 – Love Will Last Forever…

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This is a continuation of the article “You Can’t Cast Out Love – Part 1”. Click on link to read Part 1.

…The bible reads in John 8:32, “And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” We as church leaders need to be set free by the truth before we can set anyone else free with it. The truth that we need to know in regards to sinful relationships is that these couples do fall in LOVE, and their LOVE covers over the sin of their fornication. The conviction may be in their hearts, but it gives way to the LOVE that consumes them. Pease let no one misunderstand me! I clearly and emphatically declare that pre-wedding-ceremony-sex is sinful; IT IS FORNICATION. Homosexuality is a sin; adultery is a sin; teenage sexual love affairs are a sin. The fornication that is birthed out of these relationships is not a product of LOVE; it is a product of lust. Yet simultaneously, I am also clearly and emphatically acknowledging that there is still genuine LOVE in these relationships that is expressed through sexuality.

According to James 1:13-14, 13Let no one say when he is tempted, I am tempted from GOD; for GOD is incapable of being tempted by [what is] evil and He Himself tempts no one. 14But every person is tempted when he is drawn away, enticed and baited by his own evil desire (lust, passions).” Here it is made clear to us that the LOVE of Yahweh living inside of us does not tempt us to sin. Every sin, whether it be lying, stealing, cheating, cussing, hating, or fornicating is birthed out of our own lust. However, there are different types of lust – greed (lust for more), gluttony (lust for food), jealousy (lust for attention), lasciviousness (physical lust for sex), hatred (lust for death and murder), gossip (lust for destruction), loneliness (lust for companionship), stealing (lust for provision or material possessions), etc, etc, etc… This list, of course, could go on and on. My point is simply this: ‘lust’ and ‘sin’ are two synonymous and completely interchangeable words. The definition of lust is NOT ‘sexual sin’. The definition of lust is ‘the desire for unrighteousness; the willingness to break The Law’.  The reason that I am defining what lust is and what it is NOT is because it is important to understand that NOT EVERY SEXUAL SIN IS BIRTHED OUT OF SEXUAL LUST (lasciviousness).

There are times when couples, through mishandling LOVE, express sexually what they share with one another. This type of sexual sin is no more the product of lasciviousness than a person stealing food to feed their children is the product of greed. It is critical to know and discern the difference because the biblical prescription that treats one sin-sickness, will not necessarily work on another. We have to accurately diagnose the sin issue and prescribe the correct spiritual applications and revelations for deliverance. Misdiagnosing a loving couple as victims of lasciviousness will ultimately leave them “stuck” in the situation that they are in. Depression (lust for happiness), ignorance (lust for freedom from accountability), or loneliness (lust for companionship) is more likely an accurate diagnosis than lasciviousness.

So how do we as leaders help people in these situations? How do we counsel and advise them? How do we comfort the person that is experiencing the agony that I described at the beginning of this article? As a person facing this challenge, when the relationship ends or NEEDS to end, how can you stop the bleeding? WE MUST FIRST UNDERSTAND THAT WE CANNOT “CAST OUT LOVE”. You can cast out a spirit of depression, suicide, loneliness, fornication – you can break the stronghold of lust, and wash away the stains of sin. And yet, after all of the praying, rebuking, repenting, binding, pleading, reciting, communing and religious ceremonies are said and done; when every evil spirit is gone and every sin forgiven; you will still have a person that is experiencing the loss of a LOVED one.

What this person goes through is exactly what any person goes through when a loved one dies. In every literal and symbolic sense, a person going through a break-up experiences the exact same pain associated with the death of a loved one. You cannot cast out the LOVE that grew between these two people, and you cannot pray away the sadness of the loss. What a person in this type of situation needs most of all is emotional and spiritual healing. They are hurting, broken, bloody and wounded, and there is no quick fix. Prayers of repentance and scriptures about lust and sexual sin WILL NOT help the one whose heart is broken.  While prayer and repentance is a necessary part of the process, walking the person through the grieving process is just as vital. There are five stages of grieving that are commonly taught:

  1. Denial: “This can’t be happening to me.”
  2. Anger: “Why is this happening? Who is to blame?”
  3. Bargaining: “Make this not happen, and in return I will ____.”
  4. Oppression: “I’m too sad to do anything.”
  5. Acceptance: “I’m at peace with what has happened.”

 It is important to remember that although this feels exactly like the death of a loved one to the person going through it, it is not an actual death in most cases. How many people would bring back their loved ones from the grave if possible? Most people would! And herein lies the one, major difference between an actual death and the death of a relationship: in the case of a painful break-up, IT IS POSSIBLE to bring the loved one back from the grave. If both parties are willing and able to reconcile, the temptation to do so will be very strong – as strong as a mother’s desire to bring her child back from the dead! Therefore, without implementation and understanding of the grieving process, most people will never make it through step 3 before they go “grave-digging”. Step 4 is usually the crushing weight that will cause them to pick up the phone to set up a meeting to “kiss and make up” – falling back into the pit of fornication. Without support in the grieving process, this will happen over and over again becoming a vicious, sometimes life-long cycle, leading to the death of purpose and destiny in the lives of the participants –  often too leaving the involved leaders feeling helpless and ineffective.

I wrote this article because it is time for us church leaders to stop writing off every sinful relationship as a product of sexual lust and understand and acknowledge that in the midst of sin, LOVE can still live. If LOVE could not live in the midst of sin, then the Holy Spirit could not dwell in any of us! If LOVE could not live in the midst of sin, Yeshua (Jesus) would have died at birth on this sinful earth! We cannot help those suffering the agony of feeling trapped in fornication or those that have just gone through a painful separation, if we don’t understand the hurt they are feeling and why they are feeling it. Grief counseling, healing scriptures, comforting fellowship, peaceful music, positive activities and as much natural support as possible is what it is going to take – in addition to the binding, rebuking, and repenting that goes forth – in order for the person to be made whole again.

LOVE is just who GOD is, and where there is any measure of LOVE, Yahweh surely is somewhere near. In a world that is full of hatred and evil, the privilege of experiencing LOVE, no matter how it comes, is a blessing. Often times the love discovered in illicit relationships is the pathway to understanding LOVE on a greater level and learning to walk in a greater measure of LOVE.  Truly genuine LOVE will always create a pathway to the heart of The Father, which is why the scriptures say, “therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee. (Jer 31:3, KJV)”.  When it is all said and done, every sin will be forgiven and thrown into the sea of forgetfulness. When a sinful union occurs, after the couple has repented, the sin element is remembered no more. However the LOVE produced will remain forever: “Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and LOVE—and the greatest of these is LOVE. (1 Cor 13:13, NLT)”.

I say all of this to help us change our FOCUS. It is not that our approach as leaders and healers has been necessarily wrong, but it has been incomplete and disorganized. When a sick person is bleeding profusely, regardless of what else is wrong with that person, the FIRST procedure is always to address the wound that is causing the bleeding. If the bleeding is not stopped, the person will quickly bleed to death, making all other “procedures” obsolete. After all, there is no point to treating a corpse. So instead of FOCUSING on the lust of a relationship, which is a negative focus, let us focus instead on the LOVE it produced. That positive focus will enable the suffering individuals to use the power of that LOVE to begin the healing process. Remember that it is impossible for LOVE to die, as LOVE is a product of the The Nature of GOD, and GOD forever lives. Although LOVE never dies, it can be transferred or redirected. The LOVE that is shared between the couple can be channeled into loving Their Savior, themselves and their neighbors. As long as that LOVE is flowing through them, the power of that LOVE will heal them. Every wound that had been formerly infected with lust will eventually heal. Ultimately, when infected wounds heal, by default the infection of lust is purged out of their systems.

I pray that this will help us adopt new methods of counseling the broken hearted. Too many couples are dying unnecessarily on the battlefield of love because the doctors in the infirmary are treating the wrong disease. It is said that time heals all wounds, but that is not true. Time does not heal wounds, but all wounds will heal in time, if properly treated. Those wounds that never heal will eventually infect and kill us…

Please check back in for the Part 3 of this powerful article. Are you are a subscriber to the Insights from Dr. Intimacy blog? Be sure to subscribe to be notified of new articles. Your email address will never be sold or shared.

In the Power of  HIS Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Breaking the bonds of sexual perversion ~ Healing the bonds of heart-2-heart intimacy…

www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2013 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright and legal notices on this page.

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BREAK FREE In Intimacy – This IS DELIVERANCE!

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People often ask me questions about how to experience true deliverance. Sometimes deliverance can seem like an elusive mystery, or unattainable goal. Yet, I have learned on my own quest for deliverance that the shortest distance from where I am to the deliverance that I need, is the measure of distance between my face and the floor! There is no surer and more thorough way to receive an authentic breakthrough than to break free in intimacy with the LORD.

Worship is intimacy with The Father – it is pure, mind-blowing, flesh-numbing, over-powering, over-flowing, gushing, explosive intimacy. Real intimacy with your Creator is what brings about true deliverance. Prayer changes things, but intimacy transforms you. When something changes, it can always change back. Change is only temporary, but transformation is everlasting!

Your true deliverance is in the intimacy of worship, in the intimate oneness of time in His presence where there is transformation. Once He transforms you, you can never go back to being what you once were. You cannot stay bound, you cannot stay chained. You cannot remain the same when you are really touched by Yahweh God in your intimate places! It is like a virgin that will never be the same once touched; it is impossible to be what you used to be after The Lover of Your Soul touches you.

When you finally become intimate with Him and allow Him to penetrate your spirit and impregnate you, YOU WILL NOT BE THE SAME. This very truth that I am stating is why part 4 of the Understanding Intimacy series, is MY FAVORITE article on this blog. If I were you, I would read it over and over and over again. I would print it out and post it around me. I would post it on my social media networks and even write a daily decree based on this revelation of intimacy with Yahweh.

Why do I say this? Why do I feel so strongly about it? Because the moment you forget it, defeat sets in. The moment you allow yourself to believe that true deliverance can come by any other means, is the moment the enemy has a back door entrance to steal, kill and destroy your purpose in life. I know this all too well and too personally. I had been “away” for a while, off the scene where no one could find me. And to be totally honest with you, I disappeared because I just didn’t feel worthy of this call on my life.

I had been fighting a battle for a long time, questioning my worth to The Body of Christ and even as a human being. The more I pressed in to be a blessing to the people Yahweh has assigned me to, the further away I seemed to get from actually fulfilling my purpose. But The Word of The Lord came to me one night as I worshiped, and by His Word I was made clean… I was made whole… I was made aware once again that the battle is not mine, it is The LORD’s! But the only way to turn the battle over to Him and stop trying to fight it myself was through the oneness of intimate worship.

 I know why the enemy wants my hands to stay still from typing and my mouth shut from speaking, but I declare that I will not be still, nor will I be silent! My assignment is not to teach people about sex, or to deal with people’s sexual issues. The topics that are addressed in this ministry platform are necessary discussions, but only because such issues often steal from us the privilege to worship Our Creator freely. So go for yours! Go after your total deliverance in His intimate presence. That is what I did. I worshiped in pure intimacy and broke free. BREAK FREE in His presence!

Your deliverance is in Intimacy with God. True and lasting deliverance is in the transformation that happens when you BEAK FREE in intimacy, pure worship intimacy…

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Worship from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2012 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright and legal notices on this page.

Seriously??? You Think You Can Deliver the Person Who Hasn’t Even Allowed THE POWER OF THE CROSS to Help Them?!!!

A painful reality hit me last night after I spoke to a very dear friend of mine who has been living in wretched disobedience for at least five years now. This place that he is in, is a place that only the Spirit of God can help him get out of. For the scripture says in Hebrews 6:4-6,

“4 It is impossible for those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, who have shared in the Holy Spirit, 5 who have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the powers of the coming age 6 and who have fallen away, to be brought back to repentance [by another human being]. To their loss they are crucifying the Son of God all over again and subjecting him to public disgrace. (NIV)” [added for interpretation]

I am ashamed of my pride! How could I think that my love is great enough to bring him out of his sin and disobedience, when the Love of The One Who Died for him has not been enough? WOW!!! Yeshua forgive me for insulting Your Sacrifice!!

Before a person can receive mentorship or guidance from anyone, they first need to be set free through the power of their own press of prayer and fasting. Jesus Himself said, “…This kind can come out by nothing but prayer and fasting. (Mark 9:29b, NKJV)”

In 1 Cor 15:33 it reads, “Do not be misled, bad company corrupts good character.” In Ps 1:1 we are exhorted to remove ourselves from those that dwell comfortably in sin. As long as you continue to try to help people like this, you are only contaminating your own walk. All you can do for a person like this is intercede for them in the Spirit — from a distant and detached place.

Read this carefully…

…THERE IS NOTHING THAT YOU CAN DO TO HELP A FALLEN SAINT THAT WILLFULLY AND DELIBERATELY CHOOSES THE PATH OF SIN AND DISOBEDIENCE!

I set myself FREE this morning. Like and comment if you intend to follow me and loose yourself from those that are married to disobedience!!!

#THE END!

~Daily Insights from Dr. Intimacy~ © 11/19/2012

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Confuse What’s Confusing You!

Ever have a situation in which you were confused and the more you talked about it, meditated on it and even as you prayed about it, the more confused you became?!!

The truth of the matter is, whenever you are

 really confused about something, your prayers will not help your confusion. Now I know that may sound… er… well… uh…. “confusing”, but it’s not really. When you pray in your human language, the bible refers to that as “praying in your understanding”. This means that the prayers that you offer up are prayed according to your own limited insight of the situation, and uh, HELLO – we just established that you are confused! You don’t have clear insight, you are praying with the same confused mind that can’t figure out the situation to begin with. So what do you do to break the bands of confusion? Look at 1 Samuel 7:9-10,

”9 And Samuel took a suckling lamb and offered it as a whole burnt offering to the LORD. Then Samuel cried out to the LORD for Israel, and the LORD answered him. 10 Now as Samuel was offering up the burnt offering, the Philistines drew near to battle against Israel. But the LORD thundered with a loud thunder upon the Philistines that day, and so confused them that they were overcome before Israel.“

Samuel did not try to pray a deep, theological and impressive prayer. The enemy was approaching quickly and the people were in danger and didn’t know what to do. Samuel worshiped – he offered up burnt offerings – he worshiped. After he worshiped he simply cried out for help. He didn’t tell God how to help him, or what to do; he just humbly cried out for the sufficiency of God’s mighty deliverance and God answered him – not with words of instruction – but by confusing the enemies of Israel.

STOP PRAYING AND START WORSHIPING! Only through worship can you enter into His presence, where there is NO confusion. In times of confusion, don’t let pride, or your obsession to be in control of everything, hinder you. Praise and worship the King of Kings and let Him confuse what is confusing you!

~Daily Insights from Dr. Intimacy~ © 11/12/2012

Visit the full page www.facebook.com/InsightsFromDrIntimacy

Is Sexual Sin Caused by a Spirit?

While visiting another blog that addresses homosexuality amongst “so-called believers” (that is the author’s sentiment, not necessarily mine); I was struck by a statement that the author made. He was debating the existence of “the spirit of homosexuality”, claiming that people used the idea of demonic possession as an excuse to continue on in sin.  In his opinion, people sin by choice alone, influenced solely by their own sin nature and the spirit of lust. He was particularly disturbed that he had observed Pastor Benny Hinn “casting out” a spirit of homosexuality. And it may be good to mention that the gentleman that authored the article, formerly lived as a homosexual and has since dedicated himself to being a voice against it. Needless to say, he is very passionate about what he shares. His view is simply this, “There is  no spirit of heterosexuality and thus no spirit of homosexuality.”  

I thought his article brought up a very good question: Is sexual sin caused by a spirit?

I tend to agree with pastor Benny on this point. I do believe there is a spirit of homosexuality. As a matter of fact, I believe that nearly every sinful or demonic act is influenced by a particular type of demonic spirit. The author of the aforementioned article, as well as many other people, focus too greatly on how demons are named in the bible. When the truth of the matter is, the names of demons are not all that significant; it is their function and their type that matters. So you may not always see demons “named” in the Bible, but their functions and types are clearly outlined. In other words, their type is made plain by what they do; the fruit they produce in the life of the person they are affecting.

How often did we see YHshua (Jesus) cast demons out of people to heal them of an illness? “When evening had come, they brought to Him many who were demon-possessed. And He cast out the spirits with a word, and healed all who were sick.”  Mat 8:16, NKJV

Even in the case of Mary Magdalene, she was delivered from prostitution by the casting out of 7 demons. Now when He rose early on the first day of the week, He appeared first to Mary Magdalene, out of whom He had cast seven demons.” Mark 7:9, NKJV (Her prostitution is “implied” in other scriptures. She was referred to specifically as “an especially wicked sinner”.)

In actuality,  the bible very seldom identified demonic spirits by a name.  Evil spirits were identified as being – evil, wicked, unclean, perverse and so on – but seldom by an actual distinct name.  And Jesus summoned to Him His twelve disciples and gave them power and authority over unclean spirits, to drive them out, and to cure all kinds of disease and all kinds of weakness and infirmity.” Mat 10:1, AMP

Ok… So if there is now a clear understanding that demons are acknowledged, but not necessarily named, in scripture – let’s deal with the next point:“There is  no spirit of heterosexuality and thus no spirit of homosexuality.”

This statement actually made me laugh. It was borderline ridiculous, in my opinion. We do not need different spirits or “type spirits” of righteousness; such as a “spirit of heterosexuality” (if heterosexuality is being implied to be a good thing in this instance, within the confines of a marriage). We don’t need a “spirit of kindness”, “spirit of truth”, “spirit of sobriety”, etc.  In order to live righteously, there is only need of One Spirit and that is, The Holy Spirit. All righteous living is a result of the Spirit of  YHWH God at work in our lives. He is the Spirit of Truth, Spirit of Love, Spirit of Obedience… He is the very source of all that is good and right; including pure, loving intimacy between a husband and wife (heterosexuality).

In terms of heterosexual sin, sex taking place outside of the confines of marriage, that influence would be typed as a “spirit of fornication”. But in essence at the end of the day, all sexual sin – all sin of any type for that matter – is influenced by  “the spirit of lust”. The term “spirit of lust” is actually the very definition of  ‘satan’. So all sin is influenced by the spirit of satan, and likewise all righteousness is influenced by “the Spirit of YHWH God”! But the Spirit of YHWH God is omni-present because He can be everywhere, and in everyone all at once. The spirit of satan is not so. He and his cohorts are limited to influencing or indwelling only one person at a time. So satan sends out his workers like soldiers, in groups specifically assigned and trained to do (or cause) specific acts of disobedience and/or types of oppression.

So the question is: Is sexual sin caused by a spirit?

The answer is: Yes and No! 

Just as the presence of the Holy Spirit can cause you to live righteously, the presence of a “Helly” spirit can cause you to live wickedly. I believe that ignorance concerning the workings of demonic spirits in our lives causes so many Christians to live a defeated life. Identifying an evil spirit does not give us an excuse to sin; it gives us ammunition to stop sinning! Naming a spirit according to its type, is just a way of specifying how the spirit of satan is working in your life more precisely. This is actually very empowering, giving insight into what weaknesses the enemy takes advantage of, to interfere with the abundance of our lives – spirit, soul and body! After all, YHshua never cast satan out of anyone, he always cast out demons. Nor does scripture say he cast “lust” out of Mary Magdalene. It says he cast out seven demons.

My only precaution on the ‘no’ side of my answer would be using the word “cause”, since you can only be “influenced” to sin, instead of forced. We all get to choose our own path and which spirit’s influence we give in to (unless one is truly “possessed” from childhood – but that’s another topic!) So although different spirits of evil may be the cause of sin in your life, it is because of your own choice that such sin is actually manifested.

In the Power of Love,

Dr. Intimacy

Prolific Author and Speaker Specializing in Sex, Intimacy and Relationships from a Holistic Perspective – Spirit, Soul & Body

http://www.drintimacy.com

Copyright © 2012 by Laneen A. Haniah “Dr. Intimacy”. All rights reserved. Please see full copyright and legal notices on this page.